My 20 year old son began his 'bad decision tour' about 2 years ago. It started with smoking pot, experimenting with OTC drugs, and a very damaged girlfriend. His father & I are divorced and although I cannot be sure, I recall his personality shift beginning with his father confessing childhood trauma & neglect he had had (my ex-husband, not my son) as a child. My ex also after our divorce began drinking/doing drugs & was arrested and was in rehab several times- yes my son was aware of all of this. I think I should point out that my son & my ex do not have a relationship at this time. I am remarried to a wonderful man who my son is very close to & will usually go to him for advice rather than me. I'll try and be brief & specific in my situation. My son had a full schlorship based on his grades & ACT scores to a state school; he failed out by not going to classes- this was not a big deal to him. My son's girlfriend OD'd on Xanax & we told him she was no longer allowed in our home; he said ok then I'm moving out. We have given him many job opportunities with our business; he would always have something to complain about & would tell us a few times a week he was so depressed & He decided to move to another city with his girlfriend & find a job & hang out with his friends ( he said being with his friends was the only thing that made him happy) by the way: he never found a job. He & his girlfriend broke up about 10x during about a 2 month span, each time he called crying, saying he wanted to move back home to figure things out. On 3 occasions he called & said he wanted to die; to only the next day, say he didn't mean it. We offered him help, by paying for a therapist & we said he was always welcome in our home & of course we would always help him- we love him dearly. After several failed attempts to make his flight back home, he finally arrived on September 01, 2012. So, he's been here for 2 months and has been really good, like the kid I use to know; until tonight. He found a job right away & was very excited about it. He opened a bank account and had a plan for saving money to get a car & to beable to go back to school & move out. I even told him 3 days ago how proud I was of him- I think I jinxed it. He called a few hours ago from his job in tears saying it was too much for him to handle & he quit. I asked him if he had a plan & he said to find a job asap....I wonder what will be different about the next job, or the one after that? This job was within walking distance of our home and with having only 1 car at the moment this was ideal. I checked the cell phone bill online and discovered he has been calling & texting his girlfriend-that he broke up with-several times everyday. So, I am sitting up at 2:00am trying to figure what I did wrong, and now how do I fix this or is that even possible? He is causing so much stress and heartbreak to our family. I'm afraid my marriage is in jeopardy and the welfare of my son is in jeopardy and my emotional health as well. He has refused all forms of therapy or counseling. I know he needs a swift kick in the a**. The last 2 years of his BS has left me exhausted & sadly not wanting him around. How sad that I do not want to see or talk to my own child? I know that most people would say- kick him out. My biggest fear & I'm sure he knows it, is what if he snaps and does something really stupid- I couldn't live with myself; but I cannot live like this either. by the way: he father is no help in any of this, so I feel all of the burden. Any advice or guidance would be great....