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Parent Emeritus
I'm so disappointed in my 20 year & cannot even speak to him...help!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 560168"><p>DT, welcome and you are definitely not alone. I too really recommnd an alanon parents group, the one i found helped me a great deal. As they say in alanon you didnt cause it, you cant control it, and you cant cure it. It is a process to get to this point but i have realized that i cannot save my son, he has to save himself. All i can do is to contine to let him know i love him but at the same time not enable his drug use in any way.</p><p></p><p>My son is currently across the country homeless, on his own doing who knows what. My only contact with him is through FB. We have helped him many times to get treatment and the last time he walked out. He knows we love him and will support him getting help but he has to do the work, and unless he is ready to do that he is on his own.</p><p></p><p>I have been thriugh the feelings you are going through, the sleeplessnes, the deserate need to help, the obswive worry, the constant focus on your son. I am learning to detach and live and enjoy my own life...i cannot let his bad decisions ruin my life...but it is most definitely a process to get to this place.</p><p></p><p>Keep coming here for support, many of us truly understand....and do what you can to take care of and support your marriage....your son is now and adult and needs to find his own way.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 560168"] DT, welcome and you are definitely not alone. I too really recommnd an alanon parents group, the one i found helped me a great deal. As they say in alanon you didnt cause it, you cant control it, and you cant cure it. It is a process to get to this point but i have realized that i cannot save my son, he has to save himself. All i can do is to contine to let him know i love him but at the same time not enable his drug use in any way. My son is currently across the country homeless, on his own doing who knows what. My only contact with him is through FB. We have helped him many times to get treatment and the last time he walked out. He knows we love him and will support him getting help but he has to do the work, and unless he is ready to do that he is on his own. I have been thriugh the feelings you are going through, the sleeplessnes, the deserate need to help, the obswive worry, the constant focus on your son. I am learning to detach and live and enjoy my own life...i cannot let his bad decisions ruin my life...but it is most definitely a process to get to this place. Keep coming here for support, many of us truly understand....and do what you can to take care of and support your marriage....your son is now and adult and needs to find his own way. TL [/QUOTE]
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I'm so disappointed in my 20 year & cannot even speak to him...help!!!!
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