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Parent Emeritus
Im ticked, tired and feel ..argh.
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 488852" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Oh, Janet.</p><p>{{hugs}} to you and to your Billy boy.</p><p>I can understand where you are coming from on this - and where Billy is coming from - and where Tony is coming from... </p><p>The biggist problem? Is that the real problem isn't your fault, or Tony's fault, or even Billy's fault.</p><p></p><p>Blame the unfairness of life, if you want.</p><p>But... Billy does not have a secure relationship with anybody, really.</p><p>All those attachment issues - esp. insecure attachment (rather than Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), which doens't apply)...</p><p>The whole need to "look out for ME" rather than the reciprocity of healthy relationships... comes from not having had the kind of secure, healthy relationships he needed at the points in time when it was most crucial.</p><p></p><p>And so.. I think your mommy gut is right.</p><p>Its frustrating. Infuriating. Difficult.</p><p>But... just booting him out on his rear, may not really be the answer either.</p><p></p><p>There are no easy answers, when a kid is broken.</p><p>I think you and Tony have done fairly well for him... all things considered.</p><p></p><p>{{hugs}}</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 488852, member: 11791"] Oh, Janet. {{hugs}} to you and to your Billy boy. I can understand where you are coming from on this - and where Billy is coming from - and where Tony is coming from... The biggist problem? Is that the real problem isn't your fault, or Tony's fault, or even Billy's fault. Blame the unfairness of life, if you want. But... Billy does not have a secure relationship with anybody, really. All those attachment issues - esp. insecure attachment (rather than Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), which doens't apply)... The whole need to "look out for ME" rather than the reciprocity of healthy relationships... comes from not having had the kind of secure, healthy relationships he needed at the points in time when it was most crucial. And so.. I think your mommy gut is right. Its frustrating. Infuriating. Difficult. But... just booting him out on his rear, may not really be the answer either. There are no easy answers, when a kid is broken. I think you and Tony have done fairly well for him... all things considered. {{hugs}} [/QUOTE]
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Im ticked, tired and feel ..argh.
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