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Family of Origin
In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 665131" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>First, important things. I liked dolls. And I think Serenity did too. But you can play with us, too, Cedar.My Mother did a mean thing.</p><p></p><p>It was maybe 6 years after I had not seen her or spoke to her. I do not know how she knew my address.</p><p></p><p>She sent me a note that my father had been dead for 6 years or so. And that he had died of Malignant Melanoma. That was it. That was the first time I ever got real depressed. </p><p></p><p>She must have known for quite a while. Because she found out because she began to receive his social security as a divorced spouse.</p><p></p><p>That event epitomized to me her cruelty and lack of empathy. In her mind she must have been reaching out. </p><p></p><p>To me, it was a horrible blow.</p><p></p><p>On the one hand, I can see that she might have felt that I needed to know. If so, why the wait? And did it not deserve a phone call? If it was a way to reach out, could she not have called me? Or, she knew my therapist's name, and had called him once before. Could she not have called him? Lots of pain.</p><p>This is so funny. How symbolic. What a perversely lovely representation of family.</p><p>But, why do they say such mean things?</p><p></p><p>Like that man at work. Saying I had no boundaries. To me, I am the most centered of my colleagues. The most certain of who I am and very solid of what I am not. I stand firm. But it is not rigid. I give a great deal of stability and security to those around me. It is just that I do not demand power.</p><p></p><p>Why do people want to hurt us?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 665131, member: 18958"] First, important things. I liked dolls. And I think Serenity did too. But you can play with us, too, Cedar.My Mother did a mean thing. It was maybe 6 years after I had not seen her or spoke to her. I do not know how she knew my address. She sent me a note that my father had been dead for 6 years or so. And that he had died of Malignant Melanoma. That was it. That was the first time I ever got real depressed. She must have known for quite a while. Because she found out because she began to receive his social security as a divorced spouse. That event epitomized to me her cruelty and lack of empathy. In her mind she must have been reaching out. To me, it was a horrible blow. On the one hand, I can see that she might have felt that I needed to know. If so, why the wait? And did it not deserve a phone call? If it was a way to reach out, could she not have called me? Or, she knew my therapist's name, and had called him once before. Could she not have called him? Lots of pain. This is so funny. How symbolic. What a perversely lovely representation of family. But, why do they say such mean things? Like that man at work. Saying I had no boundaries. To me, I am the most centered of my colleagues. The most certain of who I am and very solid of what I am not. I stand firm. But it is not rigid. I give a great deal of stability and security to those around me. It is just that I do not demand power. Why do people want to hurt us? [/QUOTE]
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In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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