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Family of Origin
In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 665291" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>In my family of origin, both parents presented funerals as bogus events. My mother was the parent who implied, as an aunt died, or a grandmother (her mom, not my father's mother ~ that funeral, I attended) that we would not be missed, so why bother to attend when really, we had no place, there.</p><p></p><p>Isn't that something.</p><p></p><p>And I did not know then anything about the core of family, or the strength and sense of identity to be found there.</p><p></p><p>My mom (and my sister, to this day) are the same way about births in our family. Remember my posting that my mother did not come to see me while I was in the hospital with my new baby. </p><p></p><p>You believe this?!?</p><p></p><p>I just had no idea.</p><p></p><p>D H mom and dad came, of course. </p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p>Here is the difference, this morning: Always before when I thought of those things that happened to me, <em>and to my new babies</em>, I had no feelings about the right or wrong of it.</p><p></p><p>Now, I do.</p><p></p><p>Hatred.</p><p></p><p>How did these people dare do what they did to their own children? To <em>me.</em> <em>To my children.</em></p><p></p><p>?</p><p></p><p>This means I am getting better. That I see it, now.</p><p></p><p>Good.</p><p></p><p>Strangely, all I ever had to do was want to know.</p><p></p><p>And believe myself, and <em>believe in myself. And in the wonder of my having had a child; and in the wonder of that child's life, and of my own life.</em></p><p></p><p>Wow. These people really were twisted, evil people.</p><p></p><p>It rings so strangely to me.</p><p></p><p>Like a bell.</p><p></p><p>Another level, then.</p><p></p><p>Good.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 665291, member: 17461"] In my family of origin, both parents presented funerals as bogus events. My mother was the parent who implied, as an aunt died, or a grandmother (her mom, not my father's mother ~ that funeral, I attended) that we would not be missed, so why bother to attend when really, we had no place, there. Isn't that something. And I did not know then anything about the core of family, or the strength and sense of identity to be found there. My mom (and my sister, to this day) are the same way about births in our family. Remember my posting that my mother did not come to see me while I was in the hospital with my new baby. You believe this?!? I just had no idea. D H mom and dad came, of course. Cedar Here is the difference, this morning: Always before when I thought of those things that happened to me, [I]and to my new babies[/I], I had no feelings about the right or wrong of it. Now, I do. Hatred. How did these people dare do what they did to their own children? To [I]me.[/I] [I]To my children.[/I] ? This means I am getting better. That I see it, now. Good. Strangely, all I ever had to do was want to know. And believe myself, and [I]believe in myself. And in the wonder of my having had a child; and in the wonder of that child's life, and of my own life.[/I] Wow. These people really were twisted, evil people. It rings so strangely to me. Like a bell. Another level, then. Good. [/QUOTE]
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In a totally new place and need perspective? Cedar? Anyone?
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