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Is it morally right for us to kick our 19 yo son out of the house?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 576523" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>With your heart condition, if he doesn't move out he will kill you even if he doesn't touch you and it sounds like he HAS gotten violent (holes in the walls?). To me it sounds like he is using drugs that are far more potent than just pot...they all get lazy and many get violent while using. Once they turn 18, if they absolutely refuse to follow your rules, do illegal things, treat you like crapola, expect you to support them completely, as if they are ten years old...it is time to let them learn to take care of themselves. You are being very generous giving him as much time to get his act together as you have and he is basically spitting that opportunity back in your face.</p><p>Give him a list of homeless shelters in the area. Our difficult children tend to really know how to survive once they are no longer in our house. They find others like themselves to take them in (until they get angry or fed up with each other), they find good samaritans to help them out and feel sorry for them (until they get to know them) and some of them actually decide to turn it around. </p><p></p><p>You deserve a good life with your husband and kids who are kind and loving to you. You deserve to be healthy and to live a long time. You are doing the best thing for yourself and for him. I have had depression most of my life and t hat doesn't give anyone an excuse to abuse other people. If he feels he is disabled by it, he can go for help and try to apply for SSDI. He probably won't get it, b ut he can try. You are NOT his personal ATM.</p><p></p><p>Gentle hugs <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 576523, member: 1550"] With your heart condition, if he doesn't move out he will kill you even if he doesn't touch you and it sounds like he HAS gotten violent (holes in the walls?). To me it sounds like he is using drugs that are far more potent than just pot...they all get lazy and many get violent while using. Once they turn 18, if they absolutely refuse to follow your rules, do illegal things, treat you like crapola, expect you to support them completely, as if they are ten years old...it is time to let them learn to take care of themselves. You are being very generous giving him as much time to get his act together as you have and he is basically spitting that opportunity back in your face. Give him a list of homeless shelters in the area. Our difficult children tend to really know how to survive once they are no longer in our house. They find others like themselves to take them in (until they get angry or fed up with each other), they find good samaritans to help them out and feel sorry for them (until they get to know them) and some of them actually decide to turn it around. You deserve a good life with your husband and kids who are kind and loving to you. You deserve to be healthy and to live a long time. You are doing the best thing for yourself and for him. I have had depression most of my life and t hat doesn't give anyone an excuse to abuse other people. If he feels he is disabled by it, he can go for help and try to apply for SSDI. He probably won't get it, b ut he can try. You are NOT his personal ATM. Gentle hugs :) [/QUOTE]
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Is it morally right for us to kick our 19 yo son out of the house?
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