foggybayonet
New Member
Hello All,
Fourteen year old son with multiple-diagnosis is in Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Current insurance, Tricare, is unwilling to pay anymore because of lack of progress. Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is recommending we relinquish custody to the state.
Andrew has been diagnosed with ODD, Aspergers, Depression and ADHD (I might have missed some there). His problems started around at two or three with hyperactivity, got kicked out of pre-school for fighting and not listening. Struggled through elementary school bouncing from schools due to military. By the time we would get an IEP in place and a strong support team, it was time to move again. During this time lots of attacks on peers, younger siblings and adults. Started running home from school. Started playing with fire during these years and mutilated our pet fish and hid their bodies in his sisters drawer. During this time he is giving numerous medications by psychiatrist and is seeing a psychologist regularly.
As we move on to middle school the violence and running increases. Has an incident with sibling with his pants off. Unsure of exactly what happened and have been advised by multiple professionals to not create something for the sibling if there isn't anything there. Started receiving ABA therapy and attends a partial inpatient hospital for a while. Now that we are in high school violence has gotten completely out of hand by this point assaulting his mother, constantly intimidating sisters and hitting them, destroying property, holding brooms, pencils etc as weapons. Kicked out of school due to violence. Now when he runs, we have to call 911 and enlist the help of the fire and police departments where he is usually found within two hours, but several miles away from the house. Have had to call the police almost every week due to violence and or running away. We were at our wits end couldn't get the police to help, filed an unruly child declaration with juvenile, couldn't get him placed in a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) due mixing autism diagnosis, violence, Tricare insurance, "in a crisis", "not in a crisis", or no beds. Finally, after months and ER stays we found a place that would accept him.
He has been at this Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for almost six months. We aren't allowed to visit or speak to him because we are considered a trigger. Now he is suicidal and doesn't go to their school anymore and is in isolation most of the time. They constantly call saying they had to restrain and medically restrain him. I have been terrified for years that he is going to hurt one of his siblings or someone else in the community. Now I'm concerned for my wife and I also especially sleeping. He has told his grandparents he hopes they die and rot in hell. Well he has told us all that, but the fact he tells the grandparents that baffles me. Now the hospital is recommending us to relinquish our rights as parents which I believe is the safest choice for everyone and will allow him to get further help to try to keep him out of jail and alive. I have accepted that his life will most likely be in a supervised setting, but the thought of relinquishing our rights as parents is a HUGE step that is permanent. My wife and I have very different opinions, but she is starting to really fear for everyone's safety and she knows he cannot be released to us.
Many questions are running through my head now. We are residents of Georgia. Would we still be able to visit him? Would we be responsible for his actions? Would we be responsible financially for anything? What if he takes the news of this horribly, would we be notified when he is released from facilities or foster homes? Sorry I know this was long, but reading other posts and someone always asks for more details to advise.
James
Fourteen year old son with multiple-diagnosis is in Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Current insurance, Tricare, is unwilling to pay anymore because of lack of progress. Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is recommending we relinquish custody to the state.
Andrew has been diagnosed with ODD, Aspergers, Depression and ADHD (I might have missed some there). His problems started around at two or three with hyperactivity, got kicked out of pre-school for fighting and not listening. Struggled through elementary school bouncing from schools due to military. By the time we would get an IEP in place and a strong support team, it was time to move again. During this time lots of attacks on peers, younger siblings and adults. Started running home from school. Started playing with fire during these years and mutilated our pet fish and hid their bodies in his sisters drawer. During this time he is giving numerous medications by psychiatrist and is seeing a psychologist regularly.
As we move on to middle school the violence and running increases. Has an incident with sibling with his pants off. Unsure of exactly what happened and have been advised by multiple professionals to not create something for the sibling if there isn't anything there. Started receiving ABA therapy and attends a partial inpatient hospital for a while. Now that we are in high school violence has gotten completely out of hand by this point assaulting his mother, constantly intimidating sisters and hitting them, destroying property, holding brooms, pencils etc as weapons. Kicked out of school due to violence. Now when he runs, we have to call 911 and enlist the help of the fire and police departments where he is usually found within two hours, but several miles away from the house. Have had to call the police almost every week due to violence and or running away. We were at our wits end couldn't get the police to help, filed an unruly child declaration with juvenile, couldn't get him placed in a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) due mixing autism diagnosis, violence, Tricare insurance, "in a crisis", "not in a crisis", or no beds. Finally, after months and ER stays we found a place that would accept him.
He has been at this Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for almost six months. We aren't allowed to visit or speak to him because we are considered a trigger. Now he is suicidal and doesn't go to their school anymore and is in isolation most of the time. They constantly call saying they had to restrain and medically restrain him. I have been terrified for years that he is going to hurt one of his siblings or someone else in the community. Now I'm concerned for my wife and I also especially sleeping. He has told his grandparents he hopes they die and rot in hell. Well he has told us all that, but the fact he tells the grandparents that baffles me. Now the hospital is recommending us to relinquish our rights as parents which I believe is the safest choice for everyone and will allow him to get further help to try to keep him out of jail and alive. I have accepted that his life will most likely be in a supervised setting, but the thought of relinquishing our rights as parents is a HUGE step that is permanent. My wife and I have very different opinions, but she is starting to really fear for everyone's safety and she knows he cannot be released to us.
Many questions are running through my head now. We are residents of Georgia. Would we still be able to visit him? Would we be responsible for his actions? Would we be responsible financially for anything? What if he takes the news of this horribly, would we be notified when he is released from facilities or foster homes? Sorry I know this was long, but reading other posts and someone always asks for more details to advise.
James