klmno
Active Member
or did he find a drop of a conscience?
My difficult child turns 13 tomorrow- he was supposed to have a lttle party at home and a sleep-over. Then a couple of weeks ago he didn't help me at home like he was supposed to and took off to a freind's house. So, I toook the bike away (actually, the bike wheel goes in the car to eliminate potential difficult child'ness). And, I told him he better be on best behavior and study hard and help me get some things done at home if he wants this party and sleep-over. It seemed like he didn't care and didn't hear me- several times he went right on to friend's house and wouldn't come home without me calling or going to get him. So, last night I called over there and told him to get home now and start walking right now. It was cold and rainy and dark and I felt like an abusive parent for making him do this.
When he got home, soaked and cold, he said he knew he'd lost his party. He said he wasn't going to his friend's house tomorrow (today) and he didn't. He told me about the other difficult child at school. And- the biggy here- he said he needed to go ahead and tell me what he'd done. Well, I guess he'd been written up at school yesterday for horseplaying on the bus on Wednesday and was put in 3 days of in school suspension. He said the people at school were going to wait until next week to call and tell me because they knew it was his birthday and they knew I'd cancel his party. He told me he knew he's already lost the party but he thought he better go ahead and tell me about this.
Well, he was here cleaning this evening.
And today I find out that out of the group that was horseplaying, he was the only one that got 3 days of in-school suspension. Why? According to difficult child, there was a tape that recorded everything and all the kids involved were spoken to. He said a couple really downplyed their involvement- basicly said they didn't really do anything -even though you could see it on the tape. So they got slaps on the hand. My difficult child said he told them, yes, he was playing around and play fighting. So, he gets this punishment. I have to tell you- I believe this because it is a habit of my difficult child's to confess all his sin's when questioned by anyone other than me. I told him that it isn't fair for the honest person to get more punishment than the one who doesn't own up to what they do- but it does and will make him a better adult.
I told him no party- still- but if he does what he should tomorrow he can have one friend over for dinner and cake and play a little. Have I caved and done a bad thing?
My difficult child turns 13 tomorrow- he was supposed to have a lttle party at home and a sleep-over. Then a couple of weeks ago he didn't help me at home like he was supposed to and took off to a freind's house. So, I toook the bike away (actually, the bike wheel goes in the car to eliminate potential difficult child'ness). And, I told him he better be on best behavior and study hard and help me get some things done at home if he wants this party and sleep-over. It seemed like he didn't care and didn't hear me- several times he went right on to friend's house and wouldn't come home without me calling or going to get him. So, last night I called over there and told him to get home now and start walking right now. It was cold and rainy and dark and I felt like an abusive parent for making him do this.
When he got home, soaked and cold, he said he knew he'd lost his party. He said he wasn't going to his friend's house tomorrow (today) and he didn't. He told me about the other difficult child at school. And- the biggy here- he said he needed to go ahead and tell me what he'd done. Well, I guess he'd been written up at school yesterday for horseplaying on the bus on Wednesday and was put in 3 days of in school suspension. He said the people at school were going to wait until next week to call and tell me because they knew it was his birthday and they knew I'd cancel his party. He told me he knew he's already lost the party but he thought he better go ahead and tell me about this.
Well, he was here cleaning this evening.
And today I find out that out of the group that was horseplaying, he was the only one that got 3 days of in-school suspension. Why? According to difficult child, there was a tape that recorded everything and all the kids involved were spoken to. He said a couple really downplyed their involvement- basicly said they didn't really do anything -even though you could see it on the tape. So they got slaps on the hand. My difficult child said he told them, yes, he was playing around and play fighting. So, he gets this punishment. I have to tell you- I believe this because it is a habit of my difficult child's to confess all his sin's when questioned by anyone other than me. I told him that it isn't fair for the honest person to get more punishment than the one who doesn't own up to what they do- but it does and will make him a better adult.
I told him no party- still- but if he does what he should tomorrow he can have one friend over for dinner and cake and play a little. Have I caved and done a bad thing?