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Substance Abuse
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<blockquote data-quote="Sunlight" data-source="post: 18860" data-attributes="member: 97"><p>welcome home, honey. grab a chair and a cuppa. let's talk. trust is something they lost. it is something they have to earn back. they will never be perfect. their lifestyle is so different than most, they know too much...lol</p><p></p><p></p><p>for ant and I it is not so much a matter of trust anymore. yes, I have trusted him in my home again, yes I trust my car to be in the garage and I am not there and he will not dare steal it again.</p><p></p><p>but no I willnever completely let down my guard. ant is an addict. there is no cure. they can have long and even lifetimes of sobriety and be drug free. but you and I are never as innocent as when they were babies and we were so much in control.</p><p></p><p>som eof it is post traumatic stree syndrome. for a long time I would waken inthe night thinking the doorbell was ringing with bad news. why? because for about 5 yrs in a row...it was. I also notice I have seperation anxiety at times. why? because of being abandoned in scarey places by my ex.</p><p></p><p>I am getting better about it. having a loving boyfriend helps. part of it is that they train us to be wiser about them and not so naive.</p><p></p><p>i have learned to ignore ant. he has to work to live with me. we have a relationship that is 1000X better, BUT (you kow dang well there is always a but)...I will never ever be the same trusting pollyanna I was. </p><p></p><p>older, wiser, more seasoned. that is me. In a lot of ways it is better than the quivering mass of human I used to be. God helps.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sunlight, post: 18860, member: 97"] welcome home, honey. grab a chair and a cuppa. let's talk. trust is something they lost. it is something they have to earn back. they will never be perfect. their lifestyle is so different than most, they know too much...lol for ant and I it is not so much a matter of trust anymore. yes, I have trusted him in my home again, yes I trust my car to be in the garage and I am not there and he will not dare steal it again. but no I willnever completely let down my guard. ant is an addict. there is no cure. they can have long and even lifetimes of sobriety and be drug free. but you and I are never as innocent as when they were babies and we were so much in control. som eof it is post traumatic stree syndrome. for a long time I would waken inthe night thinking the doorbell was ringing with bad news. why? because for about 5 yrs in a row...it was. I also notice I have seperation anxiety at times. why? because of being abandoned in scarey places by my ex. I am getting better about it. having a loving boyfriend helps. part of it is that they train us to be wiser about them and not so naive. i have learned to ignore ant. he has to work to live with me. we have a relationship that is 1000X better, BUT (you kow dang well there is always a but)...I will never ever be the same trusting pollyanna I was. older, wiser, more seasoned. that is me. In a lot of ways it is better than the quivering mass of human I used to be. God helps. [/QUOTE]
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