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<blockquote data-quote="busywend" data-source="post: 145290" data-attributes="member: 391"><p>in my humble opinion - and I have never been married - so take this for what it is worth if anything. </p><p> </p><p>I think all relationships go through periods of ups and downs. There are times I can tell my boyfriend is not feeling thrilled to be with me and vice versa. </p><p>There are times I can tell he is not feeling attracted to me and vice versa. </p><p>Recognizing that and finding ways to bring us back up to a healthy place are the hard parts. It is easy to get to a bad place - it seems to happen without effort, huh? </p><p> </p><p>The real efforts come in when you try to improve and repair a relationship. </p><p> </p><p>He is not hearing you right now. </p><p>You are not hearing him right now. </p><p> </p><p>You are both in a frustrated, hurt, protected place. You have both decided the other is capable of hurting your heart and you have put up a wall. It is natural. It takes work to break down the wall. It does not have to crumble down. You can take one brick off at a time if that works for the relationship. Each is different. </p><p> </p><p>You are not connected at this time. You CAN be connected again. </p><p> </p><p>He may never be romantic - you sacrificed that when you married him. Mistake? Only you can decide. Is it important to you now? Are you sure he is not willing to try it?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="busywend, post: 145290, member: 391"] in my humble opinion - and I have never been married - so take this for what it is worth if anything. I think all relationships go through periods of ups and downs. There are times I can tell my boyfriend is not feeling thrilled to be with me and vice versa. There are times I can tell he is not feeling attracted to me and vice versa. Recognizing that and finding ways to bring us back up to a healthy place are the hard parts. It is easy to get to a bad place - it seems to happen without effort, huh? The real efforts come in when you try to improve and repair a relationship. He is not hearing you right now. You are not hearing him right now. You are both in a frustrated, hurt, protected place. You have both decided the other is capable of hurting your heart and you have put up a wall. It is natural. It takes work to break down the wall. It does not have to crumble down. You can take one brick off at a time if that works for the relationship. Each is different. You are not connected at this time. You CAN be connected again. He may never be romantic - you sacrificed that when you married him. Mistake? Only you can decide. Is it important to you now? Are you sure he is not willing to try it? [/QUOTE]
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