Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Let's all go for a ride on the emotional escalator, shall we? EPIC
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 330090" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>Okay, so it's nice to know that it's not just ME that thinks this is abnormal behavior <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite7" alt=":p" title="Stick Out Tongue :p" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":p" /> husband actually questioned how much of this was typical teen behavior in difficult child 1 last night, saying he didn't know because he's never had a 15yo before. And neither one of us think that our own upbringing was the healthiest parenting style that we would want to emulate. So it's actually a relief to hear everyone's reactions to this thread.</p><p> </p><p>I agree that lack of food was a major factor here. It is so dang hard to get him to eat because of the stimulant, not so much the Crohn's. But if he doesn't have this medication he is soooo obnoxious to be around. And yes, he does look manic when the stimulant is out of his system, but I don't think that qualfies as BiPolar (BP)... mood disorder of some type, though, but probably not BiPolar (BP). </p><p> </p><p>What EB said about "to try to reason with an oppositional child in the middle of an oppositional episode is like trying to reason with an alcoholic when they are drunk," is absolutely on the mark. When husband used to get like this, I backed off for the most part until he cooled down. It's harder to switch gears for me with my kid because I'm the one who's supposed to be in control of the situation, Know what I mean?? But I like the idea of being clear headed enough to offer choices to these declarative outbursts -- I agree that it would likely take the wind out of his sails -- he's not expecting a response like that.</p><p> </p><p>I know where the porn came from, but I thought I'd rounded it all up a while ago, but apparently I missed a few things -- also found a magazine in difficult child 1's room earlier this week. Confiscated that and told husband to buy him a SI Swimsuit issue or something... I do worry about how he uses sex to cope with stuff -- some of this is normal teenage stuff, but there's a history in this family with maladaptive behaviors in this department. No doubt he was trying to feel better about everything last night.</p><p> </p><p>This morning he is very cooperative and humble. And medicated of course. husband and I will talk more on this today. We had to remove the TV and video stuff because he would stay up until the wee hours with them and it would interfere with homework (he's been getting D's because he doesn't turn in homework). And he did become more focused on his school work with those distractions gone. I think it was probably a mistake for husband to give this stuff back to him. The TV at least... But clearly our current methods are not working, so it merits a different approach.</p><p> </p><p>Monday I may call the PD just to talk to someone about options. I don't think hospitalization is necessary, but that's a call for the psychiatrist to help me understand better when we see him. husband thinks difficult child 1 would benefit from a "scared straight" session with an officer. I'm on the fence. Like DF said, it's hard to know if things will escalate when they get there or if they'll eventually diffuse on their own like they did last night.</p><p> </p><p>One thing I do know is that his anger pattern is like his dad's was. He's triggered emotionally, he blows and he gets stuck in the anger and it takes a long while for him to climb out of it unless there is something to shock him out of it. And then he is very remorseful and goes out of his way to try to make amends. So as I see it there is hope for him, and it's up to us to figure out what will work best.</p><p> </p><p>I think today will be a good day. And I'm going to try to somehow get him to eat more frequently... maybe that will help.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 330090, member: 3444"] Okay, so it's nice to know that it's not just ME that thinks this is abnormal behavior :p husband actually questioned how much of this was typical teen behavior in difficult child 1 last night, saying he didn't know because he's never had a 15yo before. And neither one of us think that our own upbringing was the healthiest parenting style that we would want to emulate. So it's actually a relief to hear everyone's reactions to this thread. I agree that lack of food was a major factor here. It is so dang hard to get him to eat because of the stimulant, not so much the Crohn's. But if he doesn't have this medication he is soooo obnoxious to be around. And yes, he does look manic when the stimulant is out of his system, but I don't think that qualfies as BiPolar (BP)... mood disorder of some type, though, but probably not BiPolar (BP). What EB said about "to try to reason with an oppositional child in the middle of an oppositional episode is like trying to reason with an alcoholic when they are drunk," is absolutely on the mark. When husband used to get like this, I backed off for the most part until he cooled down. It's harder to switch gears for me with my kid because I'm the one who's supposed to be in control of the situation, Know what I mean?? But I like the idea of being clear headed enough to offer choices to these declarative outbursts -- I agree that it would likely take the wind out of his sails -- he's not expecting a response like that. I know where the porn came from, but I thought I'd rounded it all up a while ago, but apparently I missed a few things -- also found a magazine in difficult child 1's room earlier this week. Confiscated that and told husband to buy him a SI Swimsuit issue or something... I do worry about how he uses sex to cope with stuff -- some of this is normal teenage stuff, but there's a history in this family with maladaptive behaviors in this department. No doubt he was trying to feel better about everything last night. This morning he is very cooperative and humble. And medicated of course. husband and I will talk more on this today. We had to remove the TV and video stuff because he would stay up until the wee hours with them and it would interfere with homework (he's been getting D's because he doesn't turn in homework). And he did become more focused on his school work with those distractions gone. I think it was probably a mistake for husband to give this stuff back to him. The TV at least... But clearly our current methods are not working, so it merits a different approach. Monday I may call the PD just to talk to someone about options. I don't think hospitalization is necessary, but that's a call for the psychiatrist to help me understand better when we see him. husband thinks difficult child 1 would benefit from a "scared straight" session with an officer. I'm on the fence. Like DF said, it's hard to know if things will escalate when they get there or if they'll eventually diffuse on their own like they did last night. One thing I do know is that his anger pattern is like his dad's was. He's triggered emotionally, he blows and he gets stuck in the anger and it takes a long while for him to climb out of it unless there is something to shock him out of it. And then he is very remorseful and goes out of his way to try to make amends. So as I see it there is hope for him, and it's up to us to figure out what will work best. I think today will be a good day. And I'm going to try to somehow get him to eat more frequently... maybe that will help. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Let's all go for a ride on the emotional escalator, shall we? EPIC
Top