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Parent Emeritus
Lost my way-need advice!
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 498869" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Your son is an adult who has made adult choices. He does not have the right to be violent with you or anyone else. It is not an excuse that he is an addict. He is where he belongs because he has broken society's rules. I understand he is your son and you will always love him and want to help him but you are not helping him by making excuses for him and letting him come back to abuse you again. One thing I learned in my difficult child's rehab is that we can love our addicts to death. We can love them so much that we stand in their way of getting treatment.</p><p></p><p>You have been through AA so you know the drill. Have any of those recovering addicts gotten better because they did not have to face the consequences of their behavior? If you allow him to come back home he will be violent again and next time you may be seriously hurt or worse. Please get back into AA and get a sponsor so they can help you deal with this. I am not trying to be harsh but you asked for a reality check and the reality of this is that he is not going to change if you allow him to continue with his addiction in your home.</p><p></p><p>Go to the Substance Abuse forum and read some of the stories. We have all had to make that very difficult decision and draw that line in the sand with our loved ones. It's not easy but it's a matter of life and death.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 498869, member: 59"] Your son is an adult who has made adult choices. He does not have the right to be violent with you or anyone else. It is not an excuse that he is an addict. He is where he belongs because he has broken society's rules. I understand he is your son and you will always love him and want to help him but you are not helping him by making excuses for him and letting him come back to abuse you again. One thing I learned in my difficult child's rehab is that we can love our addicts to death. We can love them so much that we stand in their way of getting treatment. You have been through AA so you know the drill. Have any of those recovering addicts gotten better because they did not have to face the consequences of their behavior? If you allow him to come back home he will be violent again and next time you may be seriously hurt or worse. Please get back into AA and get a sponsor so they can help you deal with this. I am not trying to be harsh but you asked for a reality check and the reality of this is that he is not going to change if you allow him to continue with his addiction in your home. Go to the Substance Abuse forum and read some of the stories. We have all had to make that very difficult decision and draw that line in the sand with our loved ones. It's not easy but it's a matter of life and death. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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