Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Major Decisions Here - Need a lot of help!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 380356" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>nvts - I think psychiatrist hit the nail on the head. Inpatient is safe for some of our kids and I think the more admissions they have, the safer it gets for them. Admission actually became a coping tool for thank you. He had a rare admission for truly out of his control stuff, but the vast majority of his admits (16 by the time he left for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) at age 9) were very calculated on his part. But calculated or not, when you've got a kid threatening suicide (and he always had a plan) or a knife-wielding window-breaking extremely violent kid, you have no choice but to admit. They can really back us into a corner.</p><p></p><p>I also would lean towards option #3, assuming there's a heavy therapeutic component and a plan to avoid, if at all possible, future admissions. Staff needs to be prepared to deal with his more over the top behaviors as well as really engage in focused therapy to show him other ways to get the structure he craves.</p><p></p><p>I think you're absolutely right to be concerned about the ages of peers. We were lucky enough to find an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that only went to age 13 that first time around. I had exactly the same concerns - I didn't want my 9-year-old to be exposed to teen issues. We were already dealing with- enough, LOL.</p><p></p><p>As far as difficult child thinking you've given up - one thing we did that I have never regretted is when thank you left for his first Residential Treatment Center (RTC) (actually, it probably started earlier than that with all his admissions) we told him that his living situation was 100% up to him. His choices made it impossible for him to live at home safely. We acknowledged that because of his mental illness/disability he had a harder time exerting self-control and making better choices, but at the end of the day it was *his* choice to take the easy way out and rage rather than work through the problem. Until he was able to live safely in the community, it was our unhappy responsibility to give him access to as much help as possible wherever we could find it. His choice to learn and use new tools or not. Placing a difficult child outside of the home has absolutely *nothing* to do with- what the family wants and everything to do with what the difficult child needs, and I let thank you know that on a very frequent basis. *His* choice, most definitely not mine. </p><p></p><p>thank you spent a full half of his childhood in various placements. From age 9 to 16, we were a constant presence for him (weekly visits, daily phone calls, etc.). We were there, whether he participated with us or not. It was a hardship for the younger kids, in hindsight, but we did it. At 16, I hit the wall and decided that I'd had about enough of the one-sided relationship - he needed to put forth some effort for a change. It took a couple years, but he finally did figure out that we were not the bad guys. He's still a disaster on paper (drop out, unemployed, untreated, always on the verge of homelessness), but in person he is a loving son who *chooses* to come visit us frequently and *chooses* to abide by our rules consistently. Progress.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 380356, member: 8"] nvts - I think psychiatrist hit the nail on the head. Inpatient is safe for some of our kids and I think the more admissions they have, the safer it gets for them. Admission actually became a coping tool for thank you. He had a rare admission for truly out of his control stuff, but the vast majority of his admits (16 by the time he left for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) at age 9) were very calculated on his part. But calculated or not, when you've got a kid threatening suicide (and he always had a plan) or a knife-wielding window-breaking extremely violent kid, you have no choice but to admit. They can really back us into a corner. I also would lean towards option #3, assuming there's a heavy therapeutic component and a plan to avoid, if at all possible, future admissions. Staff needs to be prepared to deal with his more over the top behaviors as well as really engage in focused therapy to show him other ways to get the structure he craves. I think you're absolutely right to be concerned about the ages of peers. We were lucky enough to find an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) that only went to age 13 that first time around. I had exactly the same concerns - I didn't want my 9-year-old to be exposed to teen issues. We were already dealing with- enough, LOL. As far as difficult child thinking you've given up - one thing we did that I have never regretted is when thank you left for his first Residential Treatment Center (RTC) (actually, it probably started earlier than that with all his admissions) we told him that his living situation was 100% up to him. His choices made it impossible for him to live at home safely. We acknowledged that because of his mental illness/disability he had a harder time exerting self-control and making better choices, but at the end of the day it was *his* choice to take the easy way out and rage rather than work through the problem. Until he was able to live safely in the community, it was our unhappy responsibility to give him access to as much help as possible wherever we could find it. His choice to learn and use new tools or not. Placing a difficult child outside of the home has absolutely *nothing* to do with- what the family wants and everything to do with what the difficult child needs, and I let thank you know that on a very frequent basis. *His* choice, most definitely not mine. thank you spent a full half of his childhood in various placements. From age 9 to 16, we were a constant presence for him (weekly visits, daily phone calls, etc.). We were there, whether he participated with us or not. It was a hardship for the younger kids, in hindsight, but we did it. At 16, I hit the wall and decided that I'd had about enough of the one-sided relationship - he needed to put forth some effort for a change. It took a couple years, but he finally did figure out that we were not the bad guys. He's still a disaster on paper (drop out, unemployed, untreated, always on the verge of homelessness), but in person he is a loving son who *chooses* to come visit us frequently and *chooses* to abide by our rules consistently. Progress. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Major Decisions Here - Need a lot of help!
Top