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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 419408" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>What is it about the letters that makes you so afraid to just ask <span style="color: red"><strong><u>him</u></strong></span> WHY he's doing this? </p><p> </p><p>I think I'd make myself a list an be very honest about WHAT my reasons are for that. Write it all out, leave the list set for a few days. Then revisit that list later and look at what I wrote. </p><p> </p><p>If you intend on having a real relationship with him? What are your boundaries and rules going to be as far as dating YOU? Since you've never had other relationships? Pretend like YOU are your own MOTHER and FATHER and make yourself a list of WHAT YOU WILL AND WON'T ALLOW to date (yourself) and pretend like you would give that to him upon arriving back in the states. Stick to it. If he's not the one for you? Dump him. There are men out there that will meet and exceed your expectations (your rules/list to date my daughter/self) and if you are willing to be picky enough and patient enough? You won't continue to make the same mistakes a lot of women make getting hurt, picking loosers, picking the first guy that comes along just 'because'. </p><p> </p><p>If you just want him for (you know) - then be discreet and 'whatever' - and 'whatever' somewhere else. </p><p> </p><p>However if you are asking me? As a woman who has been lied to numerous times and played? He'd have one chance to clear it up. If it were that he was not able to be romantic and really wanted to sweep me off my feet? I'd want to know what HE was like. If I didn't like him for him? It wouldn't work anyway. If it ended up that he was doing it to save time? Take shortcuts? Just get 'you know'? OMG I think I'd scan a page out of a Harlequin book, just let him see it WAS a page out of a book - send him THAT - and say - "Sorry, didn't have time to pour my heart and soul into my letters to you any more, but saw this, thought of you. Figured you would appreciate it's finess." </p><p> </p><p>Take care -</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 419408, member: 4964"] What is it about the letters that makes you so afraid to just ask [COLOR=red][B][U]him[/U][/B][/COLOR] WHY he's doing this? I think I'd make myself a list an be very honest about WHAT my reasons are for that. Write it all out, leave the list set for a few days. Then revisit that list later and look at what I wrote. If you intend on having a real relationship with him? What are your boundaries and rules going to be as far as dating YOU? Since you've never had other relationships? Pretend like YOU are your own MOTHER and FATHER and make yourself a list of WHAT YOU WILL AND WON'T ALLOW to date (yourself) and pretend like you would give that to him upon arriving back in the states. Stick to it. If he's not the one for you? Dump him. There are men out there that will meet and exceed your expectations (your rules/list to date my daughter/self) and if you are willing to be picky enough and patient enough? You won't continue to make the same mistakes a lot of women make getting hurt, picking loosers, picking the first guy that comes along just 'because'. If you just want him for (you know) - then be discreet and 'whatever' - and 'whatever' somewhere else. However if you are asking me? As a woman who has been lied to numerous times and played? He'd have one chance to clear it up. If it were that he was not able to be romantic and really wanted to sweep me off my feet? I'd want to know what HE was like. If I didn't like him for him? It wouldn't work anyway. If it ended up that he was doing it to save time? Take shortcuts? Just get 'you know'? OMG I think I'd scan a page out of a Harlequin book, just let him see it WAS a page out of a book - send him THAT - and say - "Sorry, didn't have time to pour my heart and soul into my letters to you any more, but saw this, thought of you. Figured you would appreciate it's finess." Take care - [/QUOTE]
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