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The Watercooler
Might see my estranged parents for the 1st time in 5 years. What to do??!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Mattsmom277" data-source="post: 378201" data-attributes="member: 4264"><p>What a uncomfortable (to say the least) situation. I also think the polite approach, treat them like strangers thing is a good bet. Keep a physical buffer when you can, so if easy child isn't directly with you, find a place to enjoy the game without being near them. Just in case they try to push their luck, find some words to have prepared in the event they do attempt to force themselves on you. Something like "We have no relationship and it is working out well that way. I am here to enjoy my son and would appreciate doing so without company.". It's polite (Okay, maybe polite is a stretch, but it isn't confrontational and is to the point, and if they were pushing their luck to begin with? Well its polite in that circumstance). Or something similar, that points out that you are just there for your son and your being there does not include them.</p><p></p><p>Have you talked to your ExH? It is one thing for him to invite them to a game during his time (when you won't be there), it is another to invite them when it is a tournament you are present for. He has to know this isn't okay? Maybe mentioning it ahead of time might give him pause, for your sons sake at least, and maybe he will un invite them. Sure he might make it all about you not wanting them there, but then again, they must know you'd feel that way anyhow, so no big secret. </p><p></p><p>Whatever happens, enjoy your boy and his teams accomplishments. Just pretend like you bumped into them innocently somewhere out of the blue when you least expect it. (((hugs))) I soooo relate, I often wonder how I'll handle the inevitable "bumping into" with my own estranged mother.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mattsmom277, post: 378201, member: 4264"] What a uncomfortable (to say the least) situation. I also think the polite approach, treat them like strangers thing is a good bet. Keep a physical buffer when you can, so if easy child isn't directly with you, find a place to enjoy the game without being near them. Just in case they try to push their luck, find some words to have prepared in the event they do attempt to force themselves on you. Something like "We have no relationship and it is working out well that way. I am here to enjoy my son and would appreciate doing so without company.". It's polite (Okay, maybe polite is a stretch, but it isn't confrontational and is to the point, and if they were pushing their luck to begin with? Well its polite in that circumstance). Or something similar, that points out that you are just there for your son and your being there does not include them. Have you talked to your ExH? It is one thing for him to invite them to a game during his time (when you won't be there), it is another to invite them when it is a tournament you are present for. He has to know this isn't okay? Maybe mentioning it ahead of time might give him pause, for your sons sake at least, and maybe he will un invite them. Sure he might make it all about you not wanting them there, but then again, they must know you'd feel that way anyhow, so no big secret. Whatever happens, enjoy your boy and his teams accomplishments. Just pretend like you bumped into them innocently somewhere out of the blue when you least expect it. (((hugs))) I soooo relate, I often wonder how I'll handle the inevitable "bumping into" with my own estranged mother. [/QUOTE]
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Might see my estranged parents for the 1st time in 5 years. What to do??!!
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