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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 90537" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I am sure that it is hard to handle. The fights are not fun, neither are the behaviors. There are a couple of things that need to happen to HELP this child. And the rest of you.</p><p></p><p>This child needs a thorough evaluation by someone trained in pediatric mental health issues. Developmental pediatricians are good, as are neuropsychologists. Both do extensive testing.</p><p></p><p>A visit to a psychiatrist is also not out of line.</p><p></p><p>You need to visit the general archives on this forum. On the very last page, at the bottom, is a thread about a parent report. Have your husband start working on it with you. He should contact his ex regarding it also, insofar as remembering what happened when.</p><p></p><p>This needs to happen after you schedule the doctor visits and before you go to them. If biomom will not cooperate, do the best youcan without her.</p><p></p><p>What does your husband say about calling the police? What do you hope to accomplish with it? Is it the best way to accomplish it? Just asking here.</p><p></p><p>You need to go, today if possible, to get a copy of the explosive child and read it. Or try love and logic parenting. (also a book, love and logic is by Fay and Cline, explosive child is by Greene). You can explore <a href="http://www.loveandlogic.com" target="_blank">http://www.loveandlogic.com</a> free.</p><p></p><p>The Explosive child is NOT giving inor giving up. REad it all the way through before you make any decisions. MANY here have had good luck with these methods. Love and logic parenting may be more up your alley and your husband's. </p><p></p><p>You need to let husband do the discipline, hard as that is. It seems to me that all the fighting makes everything worse. It is one thing to impose consequences and another to fight. We fight with rivals and equals. We discipline children.</p><p></p><p>If spanking is in the picture, please consider that with most of our children it makes things worse. for varying reasons it has a totally contrary effect than expected.</p><p></p><p>It really sounds like there is something more going on than ADHD. I know you are trying to be a good mom to ALL the kids. I am sorry it is so hard.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p></p><p>Susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 90537, member: 1233"] I am sure that it is hard to handle. The fights are not fun, neither are the behaviors. There are a couple of things that need to happen to HELP this child. And the rest of you. This child needs a thorough evaluation by someone trained in pediatric mental health issues. Developmental pediatricians are good, as are neuropsychologists. Both do extensive testing. A visit to a psychiatrist is also not out of line. You need to visit the general archives on this forum. On the very last page, at the bottom, is a thread about a parent report. Have your husband start working on it with you. He should contact his ex regarding it also, insofar as remembering what happened when. This needs to happen after you schedule the doctor visits and before you go to them. If biomom will not cooperate, do the best youcan without her. What does your husband say about calling the police? What do you hope to accomplish with it? Is it the best way to accomplish it? Just asking here. You need to go, today if possible, to get a copy of the explosive child and read it. Or try love and logic parenting. (also a book, love and logic is by Fay and Cline, explosive child is by Greene). You can explore [url="http://www.loveandlogic.com"]http://www.loveandlogic.com[/url] free. The Explosive child is NOT giving inor giving up. REad it all the way through before you make any decisions. MANY here have had good luck with these methods. Love and logic parenting may be more up your alley and your husband's. You need to let husband do the discipline, hard as that is. It seems to me that all the fighting makes everything worse. It is one thing to impose consequences and another to fight. We fight with rivals and equals. We discipline children. If spanking is in the picture, please consider that with most of our children it makes things worse. for varying reasons it has a totally contrary effect than expected. It really sounds like there is something more going on than ADHD. I know you are trying to be a good mom to ALL the kids. I am sorry it is so hard. Hugs, Susie [/QUOTE]
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