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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 287740" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi.</p><p>I have a son on the spectrum. Although he has been upgraded to Aspergers, who knows. His initial diagnosis was Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. You can not "fix" a spectrum child. They are intristically wired different. What you can do is change the way you relate to him. If you don't, things may not improve. If you do, with the help of an autism expert, you can help him and yourself A LOT. Self-harm in an autistic child means "you don't GET me. I can't TAKE it!" It's common and not the same as a "typical" children doing it. They may have great vocabularies (my son does), but they have communication problems, ESPECIALLY when they feel stressed and the self-harm is often the only way they can let you know how miserable they are. They live in a world that is often very confusing to them. Although I won't say your Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son isn't manipulative, I really do think you are thinking he is more manipulative than he is. Instead, I think he is a kid on the autism spectrum who is expected to act like a kid who isn't. And he can't do it because it's like forcing yourself to change your brown eyes to blue. It's who you are.</p><p></p><p>in my humble opinion, almost all the issues you are having are related to one thing--Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. I don't know why he got tagged with all the other labels that are a part of Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, such as sensory integration. It's a given that Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids have sensory issues, attention problems, and very low frustration levels. It's all part of the disorder. My own son is never in meltdown, but I have really done a case study on Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) and I know what it is. You are trying to explain things to your son in a way that "typical" kids would understand and accept. Unfortunately Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified kids are wired differently. And when they are upset they DO become non-communicative. Mine won't grunt, but he'll start to stutter very badly. Is your son, in this program, getting help SPECIFIC to Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified? It has been my experience that behavioral management, levels, points etc. do not work with kids who have Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, which is a neurological disorder, not a psychiatric problem. If it is treated as one, it usually doesn't work. All kids on the spectrum need spectrum specific interventions and therapy from people who are very savvy about the spectrum. I think your boy means well, but is just so frustrated and confused that he explodes. I'm not sure, of course. All spectrum kids are different. But they all need a different type of parenting and discipline. Comparing him to his brother who can entertain himself is not fair in my opinion. Spectrum kids are very imagination-imparied and my son and other spectrum kids I know often have trouble amusing themselves unless they are playing videogames or watching television. Those two things fill in the lack-of-imagination gap that haunts our kids. They are also developmentally delayed. That's what Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) means: pervasive (in all areas) developmental disorder. My son is quite young for almost sixteen too. You can not hurry it.</p><p></p><p>I don't know what sort of place he is at, but I hope they understand autism. Treating him as if he just needs behavioral therapy will probably not work once he is out of there. It could work while he IS there because it is very structured. But in my opinion it won't teach him the skills he needs once he is released. All of this is JMO. Good luck!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 287740, member: 1550"] Hi. I have a son on the spectrum. Although he has been upgraded to Aspergers, who knows. His initial diagnosis was Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. You can not "fix" a spectrum child. They are intristically wired different. What you can do is change the way you relate to him. If you don't, things may not improve. If you do, with the help of an autism expert, you can help him and yourself A LOT. Self-harm in an autistic child means "you don't GET me. I can't TAKE it!" It's common and not the same as a "typical" children doing it. They may have great vocabularies (my son does), but they have communication problems, ESPECIALLY when they feel stressed and the self-harm is often the only way they can let you know how miserable they are. They live in a world that is often very confusing to them. Although I won't say your Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) son isn't manipulative, I really do think you are thinking he is more manipulative than he is. Instead, I think he is a kid on the autism spectrum who is expected to act like a kid who isn't. And he can't do it because it's like forcing yourself to change your brown eyes to blue. It's who you are. in my humble opinion, almost all the issues you are having are related to one thing--Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. I don't know why he got tagged with all the other labels that are a part of Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, such as sensory integration. It's a given that Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids have sensory issues, attention problems, and very low frustration levels. It's all part of the disorder. My own son is never in meltdown, but I have really done a case study on Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) and I know what it is. You are trying to explain things to your son in a way that "typical" kids would understand and accept. Unfortunately Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified kids are wired differently. And when they are upset they DO become non-communicative. Mine won't grunt, but he'll start to stutter very badly. Is your son, in this program, getting help SPECIFIC to Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified? It has been my experience that behavioral management, levels, points etc. do not work with kids who have Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, which is a neurological disorder, not a psychiatric problem. If it is treated as one, it usually doesn't work. All kids on the spectrum need spectrum specific interventions and therapy from people who are very savvy about the spectrum. I think your boy means well, but is just so frustrated and confused that he explodes. I'm not sure, of course. All spectrum kids are different. But they all need a different type of parenting and discipline. Comparing him to his brother who can entertain himself is not fair in my opinion. Spectrum kids are very imagination-imparied and my son and other spectrum kids I know often have trouble amusing themselves unless they are playing videogames or watching television. Those two things fill in the lack-of-imagination gap that haunts our kids. They are also developmentally delayed. That's what Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) means: pervasive (in all areas) developmental disorder. My son is quite young for almost sixteen too. You can not hurry it. I don't know what sort of place he is at, but I hope they understand autism. Treating him as if he just needs behavioral therapy will probably not work once he is out of there. It could work while he IS there because it is very structured. But in my opinion it won't teach him the skills he needs once he is released. All of this is JMO. Good luck! [/QUOTE]
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