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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 557613" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Thanks for all the replies!</p><p></p><p>To answer a few questions - NO she does not have house keys (thank goodness!). And frankly, I can't imagine that she would be in a hurry to get home. If she knew I wouldn't be home for an hour or so, she'd stay out that whole time....if not longer.</p><p></p><p>Thankfully, difficult child actually *walked* to my job today after school. And no, it didn't look like she was dropped off just around the corner or anything and just walked the last few yards. It was a warm afternoon, and she looked exactly as anyone would after a mile walk...slightly sweaty (not too sweaty)...little dusty...hair a little windblown (not too windblown)... So I was very happy to see that she had taken our talk yesterday seriously.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>For now, I did NOT tell her to find another way home. I did have a conversation with her about "adult relationships" and how adults treat other adults with respect for one another's feelings, finances, time and effort. I reminded her that her father and I are happy to support her positive actions. If we see that she is trying hard and keeping on the right path - we are happy to drive, pay for things, be there for her, etc. When parents try to offer postive support and end up feeling like they are being "played" - it hurts the relationship and makes the parents suspicious of offering more support.</p><p></p><p>She seemed to understand what I was saying.</p><p></p><p>I almost feel as if I am watching difficult child struggle between Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It's like she knows how she *should* be acting....but it's different than she *wants* to act.</p><p></p><p>Today was a good day.</p><p></p><p>We'll see if she can hold it together....in spite of boys with cars.</p><p></p><p>Thanks so much for all the good advice!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 557613, member: 6546"] Thanks for all the replies! To answer a few questions - NO she does not have house keys (thank goodness!). And frankly, I can't imagine that she would be in a hurry to get home. If she knew I wouldn't be home for an hour or so, she'd stay out that whole time....if not longer. Thankfully, difficult child actually *walked* to my job today after school. And no, it didn't look like she was dropped off just around the corner or anything and just walked the last few yards. It was a warm afternoon, and she looked exactly as anyone would after a mile walk...slightly sweaty (not too sweaty)...little dusty...hair a little windblown (not too windblown)... So I was very happy to see that she had taken our talk yesterday seriously. For now, I did NOT tell her to find another way home. I did have a conversation with her about "adult relationships" and how adults treat other adults with respect for one another's feelings, finances, time and effort. I reminded her that her father and I are happy to support her positive actions. If we see that she is trying hard and keeping on the right path - we are happy to drive, pay for things, be there for her, etc. When parents try to offer postive support and end up feeling like they are being "played" - it hurts the relationship and makes the parents suspicious of offering more support. She seemed to understand what I was saying. I almost feel as if I am watching difficult child struggle between Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It's like she knows how she *should* be acting....but it's different than she *wants* to act. Today was a good day. We'll see if she can hold it together....in spite of boys with cars. Thanks so much for all the good advice! [/QUOTE]
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