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Needing advice on how to handle son with ODD
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<blockquote data-quote="jkrohn76" data-source="post: 305446" data-attributes="member: 8032"><p>There are many psychiatric issues on both sides. His father severely abused drugs and I suffer from depression and anxiety.</p><p> </p><p>My son was rather sick growing up had many, many ear infections until I insisted on getting tubes in his ears at the age of one, he just lost the tubes at the age of 6. This of course slowed down his speech, because he couldn't hear most of the time. When we were still with his dad, my son was always very standoffish and rarely left my side almost like I had another appendage. When he was a baby and he was learning how to help get himself dressed, if I didn't put the clothes on in the same order I had the previous time he would have a complete melt down. We did eventually overcome that, but the most trouble I have is when he isn't in my direct care, like at school or on the bus. I learned, somewhat, how to stop the fits and rage before they happen, but trying to express that to teachers and bus drivers is hard, because they think he's doing this all intentional. I now from experience that he rarely strikes first, but his actions will always catch their attention before the other childs actions will. He tries to explain, but they don't listen or believe him. He's incredibly smart, but doesn't put two and two together. He can tell me the steps he needs to take to not lose his temper, but rarely makes the right choice. He responds differently everytime to different parenting methods. I've tried spankings(don't work about 75%of the time), timeouts (work about 50-75% of the time) and talking to him ( rarely works). He has hit his brother and sister so hard at time that the hand print remains for several hours. I'm trying desperately to understand, but its hard when you see the harm that he causes to others and himself(not physically, just mentally, because when its at its worst they take him out of the miscellaneous classes). It seems crazy, but I swear he doesn't have any sympathy for those that get hurt by him and will tell me they deserved it because they were bothering him. I hope this helps better, I can always go into more detail.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jkrohn76, post: 305446, member: 8032"] There are many psychiatric issues on both sides. His father severely abused drugs and I suffer from depression and anxiety. My son was rather sick growing up had many, many ear infections until I insisted on getting tubes in his ears at the age of one, he just lost the tubes at the age of 6. This of course slowed down his speech, because he couldn't hear most of the time. When we were still with his dad, my son was always very standoffish and rarely left my side almost like I had another appendage. When he was a baby and he was learning how to help get himself dressed, if I didn't put the clothes on in the same order I had the previous time he would have a complete melt down. We did eventually overcome that, but the most trouble I have is when he isn't in my direct care, like at school or on the bus. I learned, somewhat, how to stop the fits and rage before they happen, but trying to express that to teachers and bus drivers is hard, because they think he's doing this all intentional. I now from experience that he rarely strikes first, but his actions will always catch their attention before the other childs actions will. He tries to explain, but they don't listen or believe him. He's incredibly smart, but doesn't put two and two together. He can tell me the steps he needs to take to not lose his temper, but rarely makes the right choice. He responds differently everytime to different parenting methods. I've tried spankings(don't work about 75%of the time), timeouts (work about 50-75% of the time) and talking to him ( rarely works). He has hit his brother and sister so hard at time that the hand print remains for several hours. I'm trying desperately to understand, but its hard when you see the harm that he causes to others and himself(not physically, just mentally, because when its at its worst they take him out of the miscellaneous classes). It seems crazy, but I swear he doesn't have any sympathy for those that get hurt by him and will tell me they deserved it because they were bothering him. I hope this helps better, I can always go into more detail. [/QUOTE]
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