I am the mother of a 16 year old son. I honestly don't know where to start, if this journey will end well, and each day it is a chore to find the will to smile, to just be and to not curl up somewhere and sleep. I have a small farm with horses, chickens, elderly dogs and a house mouse, thank goodness for them as they keep me moving. My son is a challenge to us, his attitude and manners began to slip his freshman year of high school and no matter what we did, not being on him all the time, being too firm, not firm enough, talking to his teachers, trying to help, talking, yelling, grounding, taking things away, etc. he showed no want or will to change. He isn't as bad with me as he is with his father, but this year, with him getting up in his dad's face (and this is his biological dad), curling his hands into a fist, throwing papers in his face, yelling, walking away, slamming the door, not doing his home work, not paying attention in school, and everything we ask him to do, it is a challenge to get him to show any initiative other than rush through it and disappear into the house. He wants to sit in front of the tv, play video games, or read. He has no real friends so we never see him go out or talk to anyone. I did finally contact an adolescent child psychologist who has been seeing him on a weekly basis for about a month now. He too is seeing that when our son Drew does not want to speak, he will not. Last night, we tried to come to a middle ground with his chores and it is like he wants to not even have any, most of them he is irritated he has to do them. Such as cleaning his room, he says I want it cleaned and perfect, I explained no but vacume, dust, make his bed every day, things that are expected. He doesn't feel he should do it as I want it, that he has no "space". Same with cleaning his bathroom once a week...its a constant battle of what HE wants, and when we try to compromise, it never seems to be good enough as he will not meet us half way or even try. The counselor said, if he doesn't do his chores, what few he has, to my satisfaction, make him do it over, if he gets ****** off, too bad. This is just the tip of the iceberg. Right now were trying to get the paperwork here so I can fill it all out and get a complete psychiatric evaluation done on him so we can at least have some clues as to why he is acting in such a manner. There has been no trauma, no harsh or hard parenting, he did not move around like our eldest daughter did while my husband was active duty military, so were at a loss to all his "problems". His dad wants to kick him out when he gets to 18 and graduates high school, as he is done with these games he feels Drew is playing, and also feels he is telling the counselor what he thinks he wants to hear and playing games with him too. Me, I am really getting to the end of my patience and understanding, last night he came to me and hugged my shoulders twice, I didn't even turn or look at him, I just don't have it in me and while part of me knows he probably needs that warmth or understanding from his mom...why should I? Anyone else feel this way? Am I a horrid mom?