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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 618040" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>"I feel ashamed and depressed over it all."</p><p></p><p>I wish we could see ourselves as more than whatever the outcome of our helping the kids is turned into by them. We parents find ourselves in such crummy positions. Raising our children is what we <u>do.</u> It is impossible to turn away when they have nothing. Grandchildren lock you in. You did something wonderful for your daughter. There is no way you could have known this would be the outcome. </p><p></p><p>I am so sorry this happened to you, and that it is still happening. I am glad you found us. We are all dealing with the same kinds of betrayals. Those of us who are retired are looking at the real, irreplaceable costs. But...how do we turn away without feeling just as ashamed and depressed? It's like that old movie, Catch 22.</p><p></p><p>We are trying to learn something called "detachment" here. That is a skill set which makes all the difference in the world. </p><p></p><p>So, there is hope, there is a way to learn how to do this and survive it.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 618040, member: 17461"] "I feel ashamed and depressed over it all." I wish we could see ourselves as more than whatever the outcome of our helping the kids is turned into by them. We parents find ourselves in such crummy positions. Raising our children is what we [U]do.[/U] It is impossible to turn away when they have nothing. Grandchildren lock you in. You did something wonderful for your daughter. There is no way you could have known this would be the outcome. I am so sorry this happened to you, and that it is still happening. I am glad you found us. We are all dealing with the same kinds of betrayals. Those of us who are retired are looking at the real, irreplaceable costs. But...how do we turn away without feeling just as ashamed and depressed? It's like that old movie, Catch 22. We are trying to learn something called "detachment" here. That is a skill set which makes all the difference in the world. So, there is hope, there is a way to learn how to do this and survive it. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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