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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 523282" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Benny, sadly my SO and I arent in the best place right now together but it has nothing to do with our difficult child at this time, it has to do with his difficult child brother so I am going to answer your post anyway because at one time I was in pretty much your same situation except we didnt have near the violence you are dealing with. </p><p></p><p>My difficult child is our youngest child. Well in reality all 3 of my kids are difficult child's in some form or fashion but the youngest is the hardest. He gave us our biggest run for our money. </p><p></p><p>His teen years were hellish. I wouldnt do them over for a million bucks. He was in and out of group homes and psychiatric wards and Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s. The month he turned 19 he met a woman and a few months later she got pregnant and they had a baby the month before he turned 20. I had high hopes that the baby would straighten him up but this "baby momma" was a real piece of work and drove him nuts. On his 21st birthday he stole my check book and the two of them had a good old time spending over 1200 bucks of mine. Now we couldnt charge her because it was only his signature on the checks. Sigh. She was a smart girl. That was my line in the sand. I charged him criminally. Eventually after the trial and everything was over, we put him out. If we had been dealing with violence, things would have gone different with how we had done some of the things we did but we allowed him to stay here on house arrest and while he was awaiting trial. </p><p></p><p></p><p>I think you are doing the exact right thing. Like I said in the beginning, my SO and I arent doing very well because of his adult brother who is a difficult child. He is 53 years old and an addict who has only supposedly stopped using in September. I have reason to believe that is not true. He has turned my SO and I against each other and at this point in time we are hardly speaking to each other. Adult difficult child's should never be allowed to interfere in the lives of people.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 523282, member: 1514"] Benny, sadly my SO and I arent in the best place right now together but it has nothing to do with our difficult child at this time, it has to do with his difficult child brother so I am going to answer your post anyway because at one time I was in pretty much your same situation except we didnt have near the violence you are dealing with. My difficult child is our youngest child. Well in reality all 3 of my kids are difficult child's in some form or fashion but the youngest is the hardest. He gave us our biggest run for our money. His teen years were hellish. I wouldnt do them over for a million bucks. He was in and out of group homes and psychiatric wards and Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s. The month he turned 19 he met a woman and a few months later she got pregnant and they had a baby the month before he turned 20. I had high hopes that the baby would straighten him up but this "baby momma" was a real piece of work and drove him nuts. On his 21st birthday he stole my check book and the two of them had a good old time spending over 1200 bucks of mine. Now we couldnt charge her because it was only his signature on the checks. Sigh. She was a smart girl. That was my line in the sand. I charged him criminally. Eventually after the trial and everything was over, we put him out. If we had been dealing with violence, things would have gone different with how we had done some of the things we did but we allowed him to stay here on house arrest and while he was awaiting trial. I think you are doing the exact right thing. Like I said in the beginning, my SO and I arent doing very well because of his adult brother who is a difficult child. He is 53 years old and an addict who has only supposedly stopped using in September. I have reason to believe that is not true. He has turned my SO and I against each other and at this point in time we are hardly speaking to each other. Adult difficult child's should never be allowed to interfere in the lives of people. [/QUOTE]
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