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<blockquote data-quote="Signorina" data-source="post: 552829"><p>Hi Twin!</p><p></p><p>I too had a college student who is using pot. It was evident that using pot was a problem for my son. His grades dropped, his personality changed, his appearance declined, his friends declined, he became someone we didn't know and honestly, ashamedly- didn't like very much.</p><p></p><p>How is your son? How are his grades? If he is doing OK in school and on track - I would express my disapproval in a motherly way but then drop it. Like alcohol, many people can use marijuana "socially" without it becoming an addiction or having a negative impact on their lives. My kid was not one of them.</p><p></p><p>But I would talk to him. I would let him know that marijuana stays in the system for 30+ days and if he were to be in a car accident and test positive, he could face "under the influence" charges. I know it's a remote chance, but it has serious consequences. A local teen drove a vehicle involved in the fatal crash of her best friend. Per state law, she was taken for a blood draw. Although the prosecutor agreed she was not actually high at the time of the crash, the blood test revealed trace amounts of marijuana. The driver and the victim were 17 year old girls - best friends and seniors in HS. Now one is dead and the other is a convicted felon for life. Per the court docs:</p><p></p><p><span style="color: #444444"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><em>A blood test of XXXXXX (driver) showed traces of marijuana, but no alcohol. The victim had no alcohol or illicit drugs in her system.</em></span></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #444444"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><em>Assistant District Attorney told the judge the case could have been charged as homicide by drug-impaired driving, a 25-year felony, but that his office negotiated the lesser charge, and plea, in the interest of justice and the facts.</em></span></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #444444"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><em></em></span></span></span></p><p><span style="color: #444444"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'"><span style="font-size: 10px"><em>XXX was convicted of homicide by negligent operation of a motor vehicle; a felony and will spend 1 year in a year in jail, with release privileges to attend school, as a condition of five years probation. If she violates that or other conditions, she could go to prison for two years, and as many as five, under a sentence imposed, and stayed, by the Circuit Judge</em></span></span></span></p><p>Also, the internet is FOREVER. Blurbs, pictures, silly drunken statements are mined by various websites from twitter and facebook and will be accessible in perpetuity - long after he deletes the messages or the accounts. Future employers are going to search his name on the internet. He does not want to be associated with those types of posts. The same goes for drug testing. My 48 yo husband - who is an executive salesman - just started a new job after being heavily recruited by the company. As a condition of his offer, he was given a drug test and a physical (along with major background checks) and it was standard operating procedure for the company. Its not a rocket science or machinery operating job - and drug testing is becoming more and more commonplace. </p><p></p><p>So, when he is home - have a mother to son chat with him - and then drop it. I think it's definitely something to do in person and not over the phone or via text. This way he knows you are talking out of concern and not judgment.</p><p></p><p>I would be concerned about the loss of his roommate - and perhaps suggest he talk to someone in the mental health services or health department at his school. That must be weighing heavily upon him - it IS a lot to process. </p><p></p><p>We are here for you</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Signorina, post: 552829"] Hi Twin! I too had a college student who is using pot. It was evident that using pot was a problem for my son. His grades dropped, his personality changed, his appearance declined, his friends declined, he became someone we didn't know and honestly, ashamedly- didn't like very much. How is your son? How are his grades? If he is doing OK in school and on track - I would express my disapproval in a motherly way but then drop it. Like alcohol, many people can use marijuana "socially" without it becoming an addiction or having a negative impact on their lives. My kid was not one of them. But I would talk to him. I would let him know that marijuana stays in the system for 30+ days and if he were to be in a car accident and test positive, he could face "under the influence" charges. I know it's a remote chance, but it has serious consequences. A local teen drove a vehicle involved in the fatal crash of her best friend. Per state law, she was taken for a blood draw. Although the prosecutor agreed she was not actually high at the time of the crash, the blood test revealed trace amounts of marijuana. The driver and the victim were 17 year old girls - best friends and seniors in HS. Now one is dead and the other is a convicted felon for life. Per the court docs: [COLOR=#444444][FONT=Verdana][SIZE=2][I]A blood test of XXXXXX (driver) showed traces of marijuana, but no alcohol. The victim had no alcohol or illicit drugs in her system.[/I][/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#444444][FONT=Verdana][SIZE=2][I]Assistant District Attorney told the judge the case could have been charged as homicide by drug-impaired driving, a 25-year felony, but that his office negotiated the lesser charge, and plea, in the interest of justice and the facts. XXX was convicted of homicide by negligent operation of a motor vehicle; a felony and will spend 1 year in a year in jail, with release privileges to attend school, as a condition of five years probation. If she violates that or other conditions, she could go to prison for two years, and as many as five, under a sentence imposed, and stayed, by the Circuit Judge[/I][/SIZE][/FONT][/COLOR] Also, the internet is FOREVER. Blurbs, pictures, silly drunken statements are mined by various websites from twitter and facebook and will be accessible in perpetuity - long after he deletes the messages or the accounts. Future employers are going to search his name on the internet. He does not want to be associated with those types of posts. The same goes for drug testing. My 48 yo husband - who is an executive salesman - just started a new job after being heavily recruited by the company. As a condition of his offer, he was given a drug test and a physical (along with major background checks) and it was standard operating procedure for the company. Its not a rocket science or machinery operating job - and drug testing is becoming more and more commonplace. So, when he is home - have a mother to son chat with him - and then drop it. I think it's definitely something to do in person and not over the phone or via text. This way he knows you are talking out of concern and not judgment. I would be concerned about the loss of his roommate - and perhaps suggest he talk to someone in the mental health services or health department at his school. That must be weighing heavily upon him - it IS a lot to process. We are here for you [/QUOTE]
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