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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 296628" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>There is something going on here in his head. And I don't think it's because she's not his mother, or a usurper, or any of the other pseudo-Freudian stuff. Definitely something to share with his therapists (I'd be keeping a written log to give to therapist and psychiatrist). </p><p></p><p>As for your wife - don't let her take this personally. I don't think it's her. </p><p></p><p>AN experiment, something I did at work when I was doing a job which was fairly macho, but having problems with a male sociopathic colleague - I spent some of the week or so dressed in a very practical, unattractive, unfeminine way. Jeans. Overalls. Work boots. No make-up. Hair pulled back severely. And then I flip-flopped and spent another week dressed as femininely as I could get away with, in the job. Obviously I couldn't wear floaty satins because I needed somewhere to carry the work tools and I still had to wear a lab coat or overall sometimes, but this time I worre make-up, I did my nails, I still had to tie my hair back but I stuck a flower in it.</p><p></p><p>And with my sociopathic work mate - when I was feminine, he relaxed. He stopped seeing me as competing for his job. I was left alone to do my job without molestation. But when I looked like I meant business, he was vicious in his sabotage of me and everything i was trying to do in my job.</p><p></p><p>So please in your notes - pay attention to your wife's appearance and manner and see if he reacts more, or less, according to how feminine she appears (or not). Similarly, try to observe the way he interacts with other females and also score the other women according to how 'female' they appear, or not. For example, some women he encounters may seem more androgynous. He may find them MORE threatening, or less so. The result would be interesting and perhaps enlightening.</p><p></p><p>on the other hand, it might be more politically correct for your wife to do this!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 296628, member: 1991"] There is something going on here in his head. And I don't think it's because she's not his mother, or a usurper, or any of the other pseudo-Freudian stuff. Definitely something to share with his therapists (I'd be keeping a written log to give to therapist and psychiatrist). As for your wife - don't let her take this personally. I don't think it's her. AN experiment, something I did at work when I was doing a job which was fairly macho, but having problems with a male sociopathic colleague - I spent some of the week or so dressed in a very practical, unattractive, unfeminine way. Jeans. Overalls. Work boots. No make-up. Hair pulled back severely. And then I flip-flopped and spent another week dressed as femininely as I could get away with, in the job. Obviously I couldn't wear floaty satins because I needed somewhere to carry the work tools and I still had to wear a lab coat or overall sometimes, but this time I worre make-up, I did my nails, I still had to tie my hair back but I stuck a flower in it. And with my sociopathic work mate - when I was feminine, he relaxed. He stopped seeing me as competing for his job. I was left alone to do my job without molestation. But when I looked like I meant business, he was vicious in his sabotage of me and everything i was trying to do in my job. So please in your notes - pay attention to your wife's appearance and manner and see if he reacts more, or less, according to how feminine she appears (or not). Similarly, try to observe the way he interacts with other females and also score the other women according to how 'female' they appear, or not. For example, some women he encounters may seem more androgynous. He may find them MORE threatening, or less so. The result would be interesting and perhaps enlightening. on the other hand, it might be more politically correct for your wife to do this! Marg [/QUOTE]
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