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Parent Emeritus
Not getting to see ONLY kid on HOLIDAYS : (
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 88472" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Just a quick cavaet -- do start making plans now. If you're going to volunteer feeding others, find out where it is and get on the list of volunteers. They frequently get overwhelmed when the holidays actually approach.</p><p></p><p>Whatever you do, don't cut off your nose to spite your face. If your daughter decides she does want to spend Christmas with you, explain you made plans to do X and invite her to join you. Don't cancel whatever plans you make, just try to include her. If you cancel your plans, she will get the message that you were just doing something to fill her void. Again, it will be a weapon she will ultimately use against you. She'll say she's not going to do something, wait until she thinks you've set up something and then say she will come (nothing like making sure you are alone and she caused it). Odds are that she will then ultimately not come. Sadly, kids like ours do find the best ways to hurt us and will maximize the pain whenever possible (and saying no, yes, no is a great way).</p><p></p><p>Sadly, our love for our children gives them tremendous power over us if we let them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 88472, member: 3626"] Just a quick cavaet -- do start making plans now. If you're going to volunteer feeding others, find out where it is and get on the list of volunteers. They frequently get overwhelmed when the holidays actually approach. Whatever you do, don't cut off your nose to spite your face. If your daughter decides she does want to spend Christmas with you, explain you made plans to do X and invite her to join you. Don't cancel whatever plans you make, just try to include her. If you cancel your plans, she will get the message that you were just doing something to fill her void. Again, it will be a weapon she will ultimately use against you. She'll say she's not going to do something, wait until she thinks you've set up something and then say she will come (nothing like making sure you are alone and she caused it). Odds are that she will then ultimately not come. Sadly, kids like ours do find the best ways to hurt us and will maximize the pain whenever possible (and saying no, yes, no is a great way). Sadly, our love for our children gives them tremendous power over us if we let them. [/QUOTE]
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Not getting to see ONLY kid on HOLIDAYS : (
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