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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 546838" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Katie is choosing a topic that she feels ready to face. I bet once she works through this one, she will continue to open other topics one at a time.</p><p></p><p>When she states not knowing if she can trust you, she is asking that you only say things she wants to hear which oh course you can not guarantee. You will say what you see and it is up to her to take it as your view. It is herself she is not sure she can trust. Stay true to what you want to say. You have given it straight to her from day one. She expects it and would be confused if you actually did start saying what she wants to hear. She is looking for your wisdom yet she is unsure of how she herself will react. She wants to be grown up and be able to have a mature conversation with you but that is a little scary for her. She doesn't know if she really can without stepping back into a child's response.</p><p></p><p>Putting things in a written communication can be helpful, however, when two people are ready to face an issue that has caused a riff in their relationship, a face to face at a neutral place (quiet corner of a resturaunt) can be more healing. Agree to address only one situation. Choose the situation that seems the easiest for both of you to talk about. I would go with the one she feels she is ready to face.</p><p></p><p>Take it slow and continue to tread carefully. I hope this is a beginning of good things for you both.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 546838, member: 5096"] Katie is choosing a topic that she feels ready to face. I bet once she works through this one, she will continue to open other topics one at a time. When she states not knowing if she can trust you, she is asking that you only say things she wants to hear which oh course you can not guarantee. You will say what you see and it is up to her to take it as your view. It is herself she is not sure she can trust. Stay true to what you want to say. You have given it straight to her from day one. She expects it and would be confused if you actually did start saying what she wants to hear. She is looking for your wisdom yet she is unsure of how she herself will react. She wants to be grown up and be able to have a mature conversation with you but that is a little scary for her. She doesn't know if she really can without stepping back into a child's response. Putting things in a written communication can be helpful, however, when two people are ready to face an issue that has caused a riff in their relationship, a face to face at a neutral place (quiet corner of a resturaunt) can be more healing. Agree to address only one situation. Choose the situation that seems the easiest for both of you to talk about. I would go with the one she feels she is ready to face. Take it slow and continue to tread carefully. I hope this is a beginning of good things for you both. [/QUOTE]
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