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Oh my poor husband, deserves son of the year!
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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 88306" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>He has a spine... for the most part... but we are still mending the broken fence from last November when mother in law and I had a blow out... HUGE over K... the whole I was too hard on her, this was a "Self-fulfilling prophecy" why didn't we ever say anything... (we did) why didn't we ask for help, (we did)... </p><p>I told her hey were in denial and not to turn this into another one of her Matre oh poor me tantrums!!! SHe told me to get the F out of her house... I was about to walk out... I told her she didn't want this battle with me, because she would never see those kids again... and if she didn't believe me go and talk to the rest of my family!!! </p><p></p><p>I told her she was delusional, full of s-h-*- t.... she pushed and pushed us and her other son away from her... all of the things husband could not say, I made him say!!! SHe told me I was horrible and NO-ONE had ever spoken to her like that... I said well I didn't ask for any of this... </p><p></p><p>I told her you can't create a family that doesn't exsist, you can't use guilt and you can't pretend that K is fine!!! She isn't... no matter if you want her to be or not. I told her I grew up with this and did she for one freaking minute stop and think about all of this felt for me, to be reliving all of this... I told her to stop playing the pity card and being so selfish, and think about K, she had been going on and on for months about how they cried at night because they fely so helpless and because we would not let them help... I kept trying to explain to them, we were trying to get a diagnosis and they could help by reading and just listening when we needed to talk... and that we would let them know. </p><p>THat wasn't good enough...</p><p>So the huge blowup when we were in CHicago getting K her diagnosis from the psychiatrist1...</p><p>SO the past year I have tried to change a bit because these are K and N's only grandparents that they will really see and spend time with, and I really do like them when they are acting sane!!!</p><p></p><p>I think mother in law has tried also... basically I am calling the shots... but somethings are just crazy, like this whole Grandpa thing!!! How do you tell an 85 yo senile man "NO" ...</p><p></p><p>I have put my foot down and we are spending holidays here !!!! YEAH!!! but this oh well... it just is going to be bizarre... I like the tape idea. We do that for mother in law, send them tapes of the girls singing and talking...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 88306, member: 3155"] He has a spine... for the most part... but we are still mending the broken fence from last November when mother in law and I had a blow out... HUGE over K... the whole I was too hard on her, this was a "Self-fulfilling prophecy" why didn't we ever say anything... (we did) why didn't we ask for help, (we did)... I told her hey were in denial and not to turn this into another one of her Matre oh poor me tantrums!!! SHe told me to get the F out of her house... I was about to walk out... I told her she didn't want this battle with me, because she would never see those kids again... and if she didn't believe me go and talk to the rest of my family!!! I told her she was delusional, full of s-h-*- t.... she pushed and pushed us and her other son away from her... all of the things husband could not say, I made him say!!! SHe told me I was horrible and NO-ONE had ever spoken to her like that... I said well I didn't ask for any of this... I told her you can't create a family that doesn't exsist, you can't use guilt and you can't pretend that K is fine!!! She isn't... no matter if you want her to be or not. I told her I grew up with this and did she for one freaking minute stop and think about all of this felt for me, to be reliving all of this... I told her to stop playing the pity card and being so selfish, and think about K, she had been going on and on for months about how they cried at night because they fely so helpless and because we would not let them help... I kept trying to explain to them, we were trying to get a diagnosis and they could help by reading and just listening when we needed to talk... and that we would let them know. THat wasn't good enough... So the huge blowup when we were in CHicago getting K her diagnosis from the psychiatrist1... SO the past year I have tried to change a bit because these are K and N's only grandparents that they will really see and spend time with, and I really do like them when they are acting sane!!! I think mother in law has tried also... basically I am calling the shots... but somethings are just crazy, like this whole Grandpa thing!!! How do you tell an 85 yo senile man "NO" ... I have put my foot down and we are spending holidays here !!!! YEAH!!! but this oh well... it just is going to be bizarre... I like the tape idea. We do that for mother in law, send them tapes of the girls singing and talking... [/QUOTE]
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Oh my poor husband, deserves son of the year!
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