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Oh not Friday not another week-end...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 221860" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Well, Ropefree, they do NOT force kids to get help if they are over 13. At 17, you may still see him as a boy, but the law pretty much sees him as grown up. Nobody can make him get help, and it won't do much good anyway if he doesn't want it. I learned a long time ago that 17 is pretty much considered an adult. </p><p>As for the sleepovers, I always LIKED them in my house. That way I got to see what was going on and could supervise them. As for curfew, what time do you have him coming home? If it's 10:00, my guess is he will rebel against that. It may be the curfew, but on the weekends it is in my opinion not unreasonable to let somebody his age come home later UNLESS he is breaking the law. in my opinion you still want to hang onto him and control him as if he was still young, and he is going to pull away. This is natural. At 18, he legally doesn't have to listen to you anymore and you can't make him. You only have one choice: Making him leave your house or putting up with him growing up and doing some things his way. </p><p>I have never been clear on what his problems are. Is he only disrespectful to you? I say "only" because my daughter was a drug addict--I would have been glad if all she did was mouth off or stay out late sometimes. Not to minimize your issues, but you haven't really made them clear.</p><p>For us to give you help, we need to know more about what is going on. We don't need to know what your neighbors are doing that you don't approve of. We need to know what is going on in YOUR house that brought you to us. And do you understand that at his age you are going to HAVE to give up control soon? Is your son taking drugs? Is he stealing? Is he failing school? Tell us about him. I don't have a feel for your son at all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 221860, member: 1550"] Well, Ropefree, they do NOT force kids to get help if they are over 13. At 17, you may still see him as a boy, but the law pretty much sees him as grown up. Nobody can make him get help, and it won't do much good anyway if he doesn't want it. I learned a long time ago that 17 is pretty much considered an adult. As for the sleepovers, I always LIKED them in my house. That way I got to see what was going on and could supervise them. As for curfew, what time do you have him coming home? If it's 10:00, my guess is he will rebel against that. It may be the curfew, but on the weekends it is in my opinion not unreasonable to let somebody his age come home later UNLESS he is breaking the law. in my opinion you still want to hang onto him and control him as if he was still young, and he is going to pull away. This is natural. At 18, he legally doesn't have to listen to you anymore and you can't make him. You only have one choice: Making him leave your house or putting up with him growing up and doing some things his way. I have never been clear on what his problems are. Is he only disrespectful to you? I say "only" because my daughter was a drug addict--I would have been glad if all she did was mouth off or stay out late sometimes. Not to minimize your issues, but you haven't really made them clear. For us to give you help, we need to know more about what is going on. We don't need to know what your neighbors are doing that you don't approve of. We need to know what is going on in YOUR house that brought you to us. And do you understand that at his age you are going to HAVE to give up control soon? Is your son taking drugs? Is he stealing? Is he failing school? Tell us about him. I don't have a feel for your son at all. [/QUOTE]
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