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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 501918" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Good for you!</p><p></p><p>I was going to suggest something similar...that you really have to start turning the tables on this kid. You have explained over and over...you have addressed it in therapy....and now I think you are doing exactly the right thing by demonstrating how his words affect you.</p><p></p><p>BUT - I think you should leave out the part about how you "have no choice but to put up with his cr@p" because actually, Mom DOES have a choice. Mom CAN walk away...Mom CAN go away for a weekend...Mom CAN do something away from difficult child if he is going to be nasty to her.</p><p></p><p>{Insane--I know that we disagree on this one...but I don't think that "relationship-building" means that Mom gets treated with disrespect before, during and after the activity. That's the game we played for YEARS...and I've finally had enough. I don't do "realtionship-building" activities just for the sake of doing them....I DO require respectful behavior before doing things with difficult child. Do difficult child and I have a "good relationship"?...well, things are rocky - but I get a HECK of a lot more respect these days than I used to.}</p><p></p><p>Bunny - you GO, girl! Remember that your job is to be the mother difficult child <em>needs</em>...NOT the mother he <em>wants</em>.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 501918, member: 6546"] Good for you! I was going to suggest something similar...that you really have to start turning the tables on this kid. You have explained over and over...you have addressed it in therapy....and now I think you are doing exactly the right thing by demonstrating how his words affect you. BUT - I think you should leave out the part about how you "have no choice but to put up with his cr@p" because actually, Mom DOES have a choice. Mom CAN walk away...Mom CAN go away for a weekend...Mom CAN do something away from difficult child if he is going to be nasty to her. {Insane--I know that we disagree on this one...but I don't think that "relationship-building" means that Mom gets treated with disrespect before, during and after the activity. That's the game we played for YEARS...and I've finally had enough. I don't do "realtionship-building" activities just for the sake of doing them....I DO require respectful behavior before doing things with difficult child. Do difficult child and I have a "good relationship"?...well, things are rocky - but I get a HECK of a lot more respect these days than I used to.} Bunny - you GO, girl! Remember that your job is to be the mother difficult child [I]needs[/I]...NOT the mother he [I]wants[/I]. [/QUOTE]
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