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ok what do i do???? i'm clueless
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 284974" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Jen, it is time to hit her where it hurts.</p><p></p><p>Take a day off of work, or send her somewhere for a day or two. Then go into her room. Take a big roll of garbage bags.</p><p></p><p>Take EVERYTHING out of her room except for the bed (mattress or mattress and box springs on the floor - she will trash the frame in all likelihood because this is going to infuriate her). Leave school books in her room. Take ALL of her precious clothing OUT of ehr room in garbage bags. Leave her with 7 to 10 outfits - NOT the ones she likes the most. Take out ALL electronic anythings. No computer, radio, stereo, cell phone, mp3 player. NOTHING.</p><p></p><p>Take out her makeup and nail stuff. Take out her purses and accessories. Leave ONE pair of shoes, and MAYBE one pair of sandals.</p><p></p><p>You are going to take out all the stuffed animals, most if not all of the books, all other stuff.</p><p></p><p>She has been headed this way for quite a while now. It is NOT new. She just isn't hiding it as well as she was. Remember how you felt when you caught her with the boy? </p><p></p><p>You will have to lock her stuff up somewhere. I recommend a storage unit or maybe somewhere at husband's restaurant, if he has any storage you can use there. If you have to keep it at home then put a strong lock on the door to the room. </p><p></p><p>She needs a big shock. If she pulled this stunt on any job they would fire her. Depending on what she cheated on she could even be charged with a crime. Especially if she has the same lack of regard for the company's money that she has for the school.</p><p></p><p>To me this is a FAR bigger deal than the boy incident. Too many things like this in her school file could keep her out of a good college. And even this in her file could keep her from many scholarships to college or trade school programs.</p><p></p><p>Decide what she will have to do to EARN back "her" things. Remember, she is NOT an adult. She does NOT own "her" stuff. Not in any way, shape, or form. so she has little recourse if you decide to lock it up. </p><p></p><p>I do NOT think letting school handle an offense this big will work. She is DYING to get a reaction from you. That is the payoff, you yelling and screaming. She may have felt difficult child gets all your time and attention. </p><p></p><p>This is NOT the way to get your time and attention. Her escapades are only going to get bigger from here on out unless you can motivate her. A therapist would be good. Maybe she could earn an hour of phone time or radio or whatever for each hour with the therapist THAT SHE PARTICIPATES IN.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 284974, member: 1233"] Jen, it is time to hit her where it hurts. Take a day off of work, or send her somewhere for a day or two. Then go into her room. Take a big roll of garbage bags. Take EVERYTHING out of her room except for the bed (mattress or mattress and box springs on the floor - she will trash the frame in all likelihood because this is going to infuriate her). Leave school books in her room. Take ALL of her precious clothing OUT of ehr room in garbage bags. Leave her with 7 to 10 outfits - NOT the ones she likes the most. Take out ALL electronic anythings. No computer, radio, stereo, cell phone, mp3 player. NOTHING. Take out her makeup and nail stuff. Take out her purses and accessories. Leave ONE pair of shoes, and MAYBE one pair of sandals. You are going to take out all the stuffed animals, most if not all of the books, all other stuff. She has been headed this way for quite a while now. It is NOT new. She just isn't hiding it as well as she was. Remember how you felt when you caught her with the boy? You will have to lock her stuff up somewhere. I recommend a storage unit or maybe somewhere at husband's restaurant, if he has any storage you can use there. If you have to keep it at home then put a strong lock on the door to the room. She needs a big shock. If she pulled this stunt on any job they would fire her. Depending on what she cheated on she could even be charged with a crime. Especially if she has the same lack of regard for the company's money that she has for the school. To me this is a FAR bigger deal than the boy incident. Too many things like this in her school file could keep her out of a good college. And even this in her file could keep her from many scholarships to college or trade school programs. Decide what she will have to do to EARN back "her" things. Remember, she is NOT an adult. She does NOT own "her" stuff. Not in any way, shape, or form. so she has little recourse if you decide to lock it up. I do NOT think letting school handle an offense this big will work. She is DYING to get a reaction from you. That is the payoff, you yelling and screaming. She may have felt difficult child gets all your time and attention. This is NOT the way to get your time and attention. Her escapades are only going to get bigger from here on out unless you can motivate her. A therapist would be good. Maybe she could earn an hour of phone time or radio or whatever for each hour with the therapist THAT SHE PARTICIPATES IN. [/QUOTE]
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