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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 201335" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>When she has counselling, is there time for you or her mom to join at the beginning or end of the session? How does the counselor get your input in the newest issues? I would suggest typing up a list of concerns you are seeing and giving to the counselor. Ask for a meeting to discuss why she is getting worse instead of better. Ask what issues they are working on and what advise difficult child is getting.</p><p> </p><p>When I had a problem with easy child when she was about 10 yrs old. We saw a counsellor paid by my work. We saw him only one time and he stated that he would see her again and if we decided to continue, he would transfer us to someone who works with kids! Needless to say, I was very angry and wrote a letter to my Human Resources dept demanding that when an employee needs help for a child that they pay for the 2 sessions with someone that actually works with kids! Anyway, another reason I didn't take her back was because he pretty much told us to let her set the rules of the house - let her do whatever she wanted!!!!! Say What?</p><p> </p><p>You may want to find out what type of message this person is sending. Counsellors who work with kids need to send the message that the child must respect the adults in the household. My difficult child's councelor sends that message loud and clear when needed, "You must listen to your mom."</p><p> </p><p>The counsellor may not know that she seems to be turning away from all authority because she thinks she can choose who to obey which of course she will choose her bio-dad who is not part of every day life. </p><p> </p><p>Also, it is possible that issues do get worse before getting better while things are being worked out. In any event, the counsellor should include you in what to expect and should be receving feedback from you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 201335, member: 5096"] When she has counselling, is there time for you or her mom to join at the beginning or end of the session? How does the counselor get your input in the newest issues? I would suggest typing up a list of concerns you are seeing and giving to the counselor. Ask for a meeting to discuss why she is getting worse instead of better. Ask what issues they are working on and what advise difficult child is getting. When I had a problem with easy child when she was about 10 yrs old. We saw a counsellor paid by my work. We saw him only one time and he stated that he would see her again and if we decided to continue, he would transfer us to someone who works with kids! Needless to say, I was very angry and wrote a letter to my Human Resources dept demanding that when an employee needs help for a child that they pay for the 2 sessions with someone that actually works with kids! Anyway, another reason I didn't take her back was because he pretty much told us to let her set the rules of the house - let her do whatever she wanted!!!!! Say What? You may want to find out what type of message this person is sending. Counsellors who work with kids need to send the message that the child must respect the adults in the household. My difficult child's councelor sends that message loud and clear when needed, "You must listen to your mom." The counsellor may not know that she seems to be turning away from all authority because she thinks she can choose who to obey which of course she will choose her bio-dad who is not part of every day life. Also, it is possible that issues do get worse before getting better while things are being worked out. In any event, the counsellor should include you in what to expect and should be receving feedback from you. [/QUOTE]
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