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<blockquote data-quote="GoingNorth" data-source="post: 330296" data-attributes="member: 1963"><p>A few years back, my younger sister broke confidence with my mother and told me that back in my mother's drinking days, she had had a short affair just before my late dad got out of the military.</p><p></p><p>I knew that I'd been concieved on his last leave, but my sister's information has left me in doubt of my actual parentage. I have no way to prove it one way or the other because both my dad and my possible bio have been dead for many, many years.</p><p></p><p>In all honesty, I wish she hadn't told me this. There was nothing I could/can do to change things.</p><p></p><p>I finally realized that no matter who my actual bio father is, my DAD accepted me totally. HIS name is on my birth certificate. I can't even really fault my mother for the affair.</p><p></p><p>She was very lonely. My dad had been drafted right after they married and spent most of his time in the military in Korea and then in France. As was the norm for those days for enlisted mens' spouses, she stayed in the US towns where his unit was based as opposed to travelling overseas with him like they now do.</p><p></p><p>It's my bi-polar that makes me more sure that my dad was actually my bio as my dad was bipolar as is my sister.</p><p></p><p>To this day I don't know my sister's motivation for telling me. I don't really think she was trying to hurt me. I think it was a mixture of her illness and her being very drunk at the time.</p><p></p><p>I have NEVER confronted my mother on this issue. What difference would it make? We can't go back and change time, right? I don't know how I would've handled this had I found out about it at your son's age. I really don't. Even as an adult, it caused an awful lot of emotional turmoil for me.</p><p></p><p>In some ways I wish I actually had some info on this man if only from the point of my medical history. In most ways I just wish I never knew.</p><p></p><p>hth</p><p>ToK</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="GoingNorth, post: 330296, member: 1963"] A few years back, my younger sister broke confidence with my mother and told me that back in my mother's drinking days, she had had a short affair just before my late dad got out of the military. I knew that I'd been concieved on his last leave, but my sister's information has left me in doubt of my actual parentage. I have no way to prove it one way or the other because both my dad and my possible bio have been dead for many, many years. In all honesty, I wish she hadn't told me this. There was nothing I could/can do to change things. I finally realized that no matter who my actual bio father is, my DAD accepted me totally. HIS name is on my birth certificate. I can't even really fault my mother for the affair. She was very lonely. My dad had been drafted right after they married and spent most of his time in the military in Korea and then in France. As was the norm for those days for enlisted mens' spouses, she stayed in the US towns where his unit was based as opposed to travelling overseas with him like they now do. It's my bi-polar that makes me more sure that my dad was actually my bio as my dad was bipolar as is my sister. To this day I don't know my sister's motivation for telling me. I don't really think she was trying to hurt me. I think it was a mixture of her illness and her being very drunk at the time. I have NEVER confronted my mother on this issue. What difference would it make? We can't go back and change time, right? I don't know how I would've handled this had I found out about it at your son's age. I really don't. Even as an adult, it caused an awful lot of emotional turmoil for me. In some ways I wish I actually had some info on this man if only from the point of my medical history. In most ways I just wish I never knew. hth ToK [/QUOTE]
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