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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 406283" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Wow. </p><p></p><p>First off I've got to be honest with you. Your husbands relationship with his parents/mother is not healthy nor "normal". It appears from your post your mother in law is controlling (to the hilt) and manipulative (to the hilt) and your husband will not/ can not break away from it. </p><p></p><p>I can't tell you what is best for you and your son. All I can tell you is what I would do in a similar situation. I would leave. Husband would either love me enough to come with me, or he'd stay with his mother. Stinks to high heaven, but I don't see anyway for you to win in this situation.</p><p></p><p>Your husband is obviously very dependent on his mother/parents. That won't change unless he wants to change it, and even then it won't be easy for him to do. You could attempt couple counseling, but I have a feeling that your mother in law will find a way to make this look as if you're controlling him blah blah blah.</p><p></p><p>If it were me? I'd pack up and get as far away as possible. But then I grew up with a mother like that and I know the damage that can be done. You won't change her. She won't give up control without one heck of a fight. And he has to not only want it but be willing to fight her for his independence. Not an easy thing for someone who's lived that way their whole lives.</p><p></p><p>Welcome to the board. </p><p></p><p>(((hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 406283, member: 84"] Wow. First off I've got to be honest with you. Your husbands relationship with his parents/mother is not healthy nor "normal". It appears from your post your mother in law is controlling (to the hilt) and manipulative (to the hilt) and your husband will not/ can not break away from it. I can't tell you what is best for you and your son. All I can tell you is what I would do in a similar situation. I would leave. Husband would either love me enough to come with me, or he'd stay with his mother. Stinks to high heaven, but I don't see anyway for you to win in this situation. Your husband is obviously very dependent on his mother/parents. That won't change unless he wants to change it, and even then it won't be easy for him to do. You could attempt couple counseling, but I have a feeling that your mother in law will find a way to make this look as if you're controlling him blah blah blah. If it were me? I'd pack up and get as far away as possible. But then I grew up with a mother like that and I know the damage that can be done. You won't change her. She won't give up control without one heck of a fight. And he has to not only want it but be willing to fight her for his independence. Not an easy thing for someone who's lived that way their whole lives. Welcome to the board. (((hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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