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General Parenting
Parents Opposite Views of Discipline
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 379716" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>If your husband's rule is enforceable, it is worth trying. Certainly, try it and support him even if you think it will fail. Then WHEN it fails, sit down and talk it through with him. If it doesn't fail, then he could be onto something.</p><p></p><p>I've just posted on someone else's thread, another new person. Read around this site and see what works. On discipline, "Explosive Child" by Ross Greene is a different way of looking at discipline especially with oppositional kids, and can break the resistance cycle. You will have already realised that getting increasingly strict only increases the resistance from the kid. To break the cycle you have to at first seem to give way; but soon the child has to realise that they have to take control of themselves and apply self-discipline. This is actually the long-term goal of all parents, to have your child grow to be a mature self-disciplined adult. It seems laughable at this stage, but sometimes there are short-cuts.</p><p></p><p>A child who is capable of being incredibly resistant to your discipline is a child whose stubbornness can be turned inwards to self-control (to an amazingly high level). The book helps.</p><p></p><p>Read around, see what you can scavenge in terms of support and information. Your husband will also find support here. My husband now is a member here, it has really helped us both on the same page, when we have come from very different backgrounds.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 379716, member: 1991"] If your husband's rule is enforceable, it is worth trying. Certainly, try it and support him even if you think it will fail. Then WHEN it fails, sit down and talk it through with him. If it doesn't fail, then he could be onto something. I've just posted on someone else's thread, another new person. Read around this site and see what works. On discipline, "Explosive Child" by Ross Greene is a different way of looking at discipline especially with oppositional kids, and can break the resistance cycle. You will have already realised that getting increasingly strict only increases the resistance from the kid. To break the cycle you have to at first seem to give way; but soon the child has to realise that they have to take control of themselves and apply self-discipline. This is actually the long-term goal of all parents, to have your child grow to be a mature self-disciplined adult. It seems laughable at this stage, but sometimes there are short-cuts. A child who is capable of being incredibly resistant to your discipline is a child whose stubbornness can be turned inwards to self-control (to an amazingly high level). The book helps. Read around, see what you can scavenge in terms of support and information. Your husband will also find support here. My husband now is a member here, it has really helped us both on the same page, when we have come from very different backgrounds. Marg [/QUOTE]
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