newly worried parent
New Member
Hi there everyone! I am brand new to this site and have been reading a bit on some of your posts. I'm not really sure which direction to go right now but figured I would start here and get some suggestions. I will try to explain my son's (D) situation in as few words as possible, so please bear with me.
D is 10 and has just (2 days ago) been diagnosis with Severe Mood Disorder/possibility of Bipolar Disorder characteristics (medications:Lamictal: 1st Day on it). He was also recently (1 1/2 mnths ago) diagnosis with Tic Disorder (medications: Guanfasine: 5 wks now). Prior to about 1yr ago, D was a very typical boy: happy, sincere, caring, Very Creative/artistic, loving, great student at school...Normal anger/frustration with younger brother, very intelligent but a little low on the maturity level compared to kids his age (probably about a year or 2 behind:not in how smart he is,rather in the things that interest him:toys, etc...) However, in the past year, he has taken a dramatic turn from his typical self: seems very unhappy, sad, depressed, irritated, frustrated, angry, thin skinned most of the time. The good moods, happiness, smiles,etc..all are far shadowed by the bad times. My husband and I usually say quietly to each other "wow, he's in a good mood/he playing with his little brother for once-Let's write this in the record book!" He can't stand his little brother C(6) and probably 80-90% of his mood is directed at him at home (C loves D to death and would do anything for him, however he really knows how to pester and push Ds buttons, and he does!) D also makes a lot of statements like "I always get in trouble even if it's Cs fault" "C never gets in trouble, but I always do" etc...(I have spoken to D about this several times and have to admit he probably was targeted to get in trouble more than C because we were un-intentionally quicker to punish the one that is grumpy and complains all the time rather than the one that is always silly, funny, and is rarely in a bad mood at all. We have been working on correcting this on our end.) This year at school D barely passed:unable to focus,very forgetful,spacey,not listening very well,horrible grades, in "Lala Land" per his teachers,etc...) He also has had trouble making friends due to his maturity level. He is very over bearing when he is excited or interested in something. He has things that he's interested in at stages in his life and they are all encompassing:when he was younger it was Trains, then Titanic, then Pokemon, then Bakugan, now Bay Blades. But he doesn't just like each thing, he is infatuated with them. He thinks/talks about them all day every day in every aspect of his life. His imagination is endless and he is extremely creative and loves to draw draw draw! However, his imagination tied in with his infatuations tend to run away with him sometimes and he starts to make unrealistic things tie into reality. Ex: "Mom, do you think a Bay Blade would beat Dad in a battle?" "Do you think this Pokemon is more powerful than God?" These things become almost all he talks about to kids and they find him annoying, however he doesn't see that they are annoyed. He also can't stand to lose. When he plays games, he will make up rules that make him win. He gets very upset if he loses. He also insists on being whichever character he wants to be, regardless if another kid wants to be that character, etc...Basically, he makes the rules and he always ends up on top. Not very much fun for the other kids. He also has trouble listening to other kids talk when he is playing with them or talking about something he is interested in:He talks a million miles per hour and does not give them a chance to talk, acts very silly (ex:talks like a baby,acts wild/hyper,etc...) and doesn't pay attention to their signals to see if they are interested in what he's talking about, annoyed, etc...So he is also picked on at school and kids try to avoid him because he annoys them, which has really bothered him. He feels nobody likes him and he has no friends. However my biggest concern is the sad, unhappy, depressed, angry mood he seems to be in majority of the time. This is so very uncharacteristic for him! And his moods change drastically, constantly and suddenly. One minute he's up (although not often),then suddenly and for little to no reason he is way down.
A little history: My mother had lots of issues with anxiety and depression and was an alcoholic. My brother was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and even though not diagnosed with it, I believe was at least borderline paranoid schitzophrenic (sorry if I spelled that incorrectly.) He tried to commit suicide (slit wrist);heard voices in his head(and even spoke very quietly to them one day while I was at lunch with him and he didn't even realize he was doing it); thought McDonald's was poisoning his food;Thought people he worked with were going to poison his water cooler so he wanted to put a chain over the top so they couldn't get it open;etc...Alcoholism also runs on my dad's side (his father.) I am not on any drugs, but have been in my younger years and have a very addictive personality. I always say the only thing that saved me from being a drug addict was getting pregnant with D There have been no tramatic events (that I can think of) that have happened to him, his father and I have a very strong, very happy marriage. We do not smoke, drink (except on rare occassions, but never in front of our kids), do any illegal drugs, etc...
I'm just worried about Dr's being so quick to diagnosis things such as depression, Bipolar, mood disorders, etc... and then shove medications down throats! I'm not opposed to medications, AS LONG AS THEY ARE TRUELY NEEDED! I just want to make sure they are treating him for the right diagnosis. Any suggestions/advice/opinions would be greatly appreciated! I just want my son to be happy again!
Thanks so much,
Amber
D is 10 and has just (2 days ago) been diagnosis with Severe Mood Disorder/possibility of Bipolar Disorder characteristics (medications:Lamictal: 1st Day on it). He was also recently (1 1/2 mnths ago) diagnosis with Tic Disorder (medications: Guanfasine: 5 wks now). Prior to about 1yr ago, D was a very typical boy: happy, sincere, caring, Very Creative/artistic, loving, great student at school...Normal anger/frustration with younger brother, very intelligent but a little low on the maturity level compared to kids his age (probably about a year or 2 behind:not in how smart he is,rather in the things that interest him:toys, etc...) However, in the past year, he has taken a dramatic turn from his typical self: seems very unhappy, sad, depressed, irritated, frustrated, angry, thin skinned most of the time. The good moods, happiness, smiles,etc..all are far shadowed by the bad times. My husband and I usually say quietly to each other "wow, he's in a good mood/he playing with his little brother for once-Let's write this in the record book!" He can't stand his little brother C(6) and probably 80-90% of his mood is directed at him at home (C loves D to death and would do anything for him, however he really knows how to pester and push Ds buttons, and he does!) D also makes a lot of statements like "I always get in trouble even if it's Cs fault" "C never gets in trouble, but I always do" etc...(I have spoken to D about this several times and have to admit he probably was targeted to get in trouble more than C because we were un-intentionally quicker to punish the one that is grumpy and complains all the time rather than the one that is always silly, funny, and is rarely in a bad mood at all. We have been working on correcting this on our end.) This year at school D barely passed:unable to focus,very forgetful,spacey,not listening very well,horrible grades, in "Lala Land" per his teachers,etc...) He also has had trouble making friends due to his maturity level. He is very over bearing when he is excited or interested in something. He has things that he's interested in at stages in his life and they are all encompassing:when he was younger it was Trains, then Titanic, then Pokemon, then Bakugan, now Bay Blades. But he doesn't just like each thing, he is infatuated with them. He thinks/talks about them all day every day in every aspect of his life. His imagination is endless and he is extremely creative and loves to draw draw draw! However, his imagination tied in with his infatuations tend to run away with him sometimes and he starts to make unrealistic things tie into reality. Ex: "Mom, do you think a Bay Blade would beat Dad in a battle?" "Do you think this Pokemon is more powerful than God?" These things become almost all he talks about to kids and they find him annoying, however he doesn't see that they are annoyed. He also can't stand to lose. When he plays games, he will make up rules that make him win. He gets very upset if he loses. He also insists on being whichever character he wants to be, regardless if another kid wants to be that character, etc...Basically, he makes the rules and he always ends up on top. Not very much fun for the other kids. He also has trouble listening to other kids talk when he is playing with them or talking about something he is interested in:He talks a million miles per hour and does not give them a chance to talk, acts very silly (ex:talks like a baby,acts wild/hyper,etc...) and doesn't pay attention to their signals to see if they are interested in what he's talking about, annoyed, etc...So he is also picked on at school and kids try to avoid him because he annoys them, which has really bothered him. He feels nobody likes him and he has no friends. However my biggest concern is the sad, unhappy, depressed, angry mood he seems to be in majority of the time. This is so very uncharacteristic for him! And his moods change drastically, constantly and suddenly. One minute he's up (although not often),then suddenly and for little to no reason he is way down.
A little history: My mother had lots of issues with anxiety and depression and was an alcoholic. My brother was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and even though not diagnosed with it, I believe was at least borderline paranoid schitzophrenic (sorry if I spelled that incorrectly.) He tried to commit suicide (slit wrist);heard voices in his head(and even spoke very quietly to them one day while I was at lunch with him and he didn't even realize he was doing it); thought McDonald's was poisoning his food;Thought people he worked with were going to poison his water cooler so he wanted to put a chain over the top so they couldn't get it open;etc...Alcoholism also runs on my dad's side (his father.) I am not on any drugs, but have been in my younger years and have a very addictive personality. I always say the only thing that saved me from being a drug addict was getting pregnant with D There have been no tramatic events (that I can think of) that have happened to him, his father and I have a very strong, very happy marriage. We do not smoke, drink (except on rare occassions, but never in front of our kids), do any illegal drugs, etc...
I'm just worried about Dr's being so quick to diagnosis things such as depression, Bipolar, mood disorders, etc... and then shove medications down throats! I'm not opposed to medications, AS LONG AS THEY ARE TRUELY NEEDED! I just want to make sure they are treating him for the right diagnosis. Any suggestions/advice/opinions would be greatly appreciated! I just want my son to be happy again!
Thanks so much,
Amber