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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 512973" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>LBM - hi - welcome - <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/hugs.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":hugs:" title="hugs :hugs:" data-shortname=":hugs:" /></p><p></p><p>You could be telling my story.</p><p></p><p>As far as husband lying about the custody thing... Umm... been there done that and I bet he thought it was over. It is NEVER NEVER NEVER OVER. Onyxx & Jett's mother passed away last July and we are STILL dealing with problems that stem from the custody garbage (that went on for NINE YEARS).</p><p></p><p>If all 3 kids have issues - you can darn well BET something horrid was happening to them. Now - you know this as well as I do - acting like an ostrich is only going to make things worse.</p><p></p><p>As a step-parent, as well, I can tell you a few things...</p><p></p><p>One. It is husband's job to step up. You CANNOT LEGALLY DO ANYTHING, as long as bio mom has ANY RIGHTS. In fact, I <em>still</em> can't legally do anything - except... I have a POA for my husband. I insisted. Loudly. If he doesn't? YOU STEP DOWN. AWAY. See #3 below.</p><p></p><p>Two. If your husband has <em>full legal custody</em> then the 13-y/o <em>staying </em>with bio mom is a violation of said court order. How can you not "get him back"? Does everyone refuse to enforce a court order? Does bio mom have visitation rights?</p><p></p><p>Three. You have another child who MUST AT ALL COSTS BE PROTECTED. If this means you must separate, even temporarily, do it.</p><p></p><p>Question - 13-y/o - what KIND of investigations? (Honey, don't worry about shocking us. Onyxx's stepfather raped her, repeatedly, over the course of 2 years - but nothing was done, because bio mom had made false accusations against husband. See what I mean?)</p><p></p><p>I'm still fighting a battle with a ghost. In my case, my husband yanked his head out of the sand - finally. It's helped immensely.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 512973, member: 6705"] LBM - hi - welcome - :hugs: You could be telling my story. As far as husband lying about the custody thing... Umm... been there done that and I bet he thought it was over. It is NEVER NEVER NEVER OVER. Onyxx & Jett's mother passed away last July and we are STILL dealing with problems that stem from the custody garbage (that went on for NINE YEARS). If all 3 kids have issues - you can darn well BET something horrid was happening to them. Now - you know this as well as I do - acting like an ostrich is only going to make things worse. As a step-parent, as well, I can tell you a few things... One. It is husband's job to step up. You CANNOT LEGALLY DO ANYTHING, as long as bio mom has ANY RIGHTS. In fact, I [I]still[/I] can't legally do anything - except... I have a POA for my husband. I insisted. Loudly. If he doesn't? YOU STEP DOWN. AWAY. See #3 below. Two. If your husband has [I]full legal custody[/I] then the 13-y/o [I]staying [/I]with bio mom is a violation of said court order. How can you not "get him back"? Does everyone refuse to enforce a court order? Does bio mom have visitation rights? Three. You have another child who MUST AT ALL COSTS BE PROTECTED. If this means you must separate, even temporarily, do it. Question - 13-y/o - what KIND of investigations? (Honey, don't worry about shocking us. Onyxx's stepfather raped her, repeatedly, over the course of 2 years - but nothing was done, because bio mom had made false accusations against husband. See what I mean?) I'm still fighting a battle with a ghost. In my case, my husband yanked his head out of the sand - finally. It's helped immensely. [/QUOTE]
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