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Please, PLEASE someone HELP ME!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="OMGWTF" data-source="post: 403507" data-attributes="member: 11051"><p>I am about to lose my damn mind here! My Bio Son is 13 YO and is 'tentatively diagnosed' as CD/ADD/Asperger's even though since he was about 6 YO, I have heard every diagnosis under the sun for him. He has taken every prescription drug known to man to try and take the edge off his behaviors, some of them would work for a short time, then we would have to try something else. He was taken off all medications about a year and a half ago with mixed results. His new psychiatric. has him taking 10mg of Adderall right now which seems to help curb the behaviors at school. He is still getting crappy grades and whatnot. He has been a difficult kid since he was about two years old when he started displaying his defiant behaviors; it took him finally being hospitalized at the age of 6 for someone to finally take me seriously that something is not right with my son. Since then, he has been in the mental health system. I have a two foot tall stack of paperwork on him as well. I am ashamed to say it, but I felt no choice but to start a papertrail on him to protect myself and my other kids. My son's BioDad is not in the picture and the last time my son saw him was 2004. He has no contact with his BioDad whatsoever, and it's probably for the best. </p><p> </p><p>My son can be good...when he wants to be. The pattern of behavior I saw unfold over the years was that when a new situation presents itself, it will be anywhere from three weeks to three months before his defiance comes back and he goes off on a nut. Until then, I have gone through so many day care providers it's not even funny. BioSon has been suspended/expelled from every school he has ever attended. He was even expelled from kindergarten for acting like a wild animal and attacking a teacher and principal. He repeated first grade as well. At the start of every school year, I have to pull his teachers aside and warn them about my son. They always tell me 'oh, he'll be OK' and sure enough, in the timeframe of three weeks to three months, they are calling me evety other day telling me that he's suspended from school, to come and get him, he has detention, etc. The only reason he is in seventh grade is because his teachers at his last school last year were so tired of his antics that they went ahead and passed him just to get rid of him. </p><p> </p><p>My son has been adjudicated through the Juvenile court system and he spent his eleventh birthday in solitary when he threatened to kill me and my daughter with a knife, destroyed his bedroom, and destroyed school property as well. He was placed on probation for nearly two years and removed from my home to go to foster care as well. The first foster family gave him back at the six month mark because they could not handle him as well. He was returned to my custody at the end of the 2009 school year. </p><p> </p><p>I have a Bio daughter as well, she is eleven. I remarried this past June and now have two SSons (13 and 18 YO) and a SDaughter, who is ten. My husband is in the Army and is currently deployed. I have known my husband for over ten years, we served in the Army together and kept in touch after I got out. My husband is a great guy, but he was skeptical when I filled him in on the craziness I have had to deal with at the hands of my son for all these years. My husband deployed a little over a month ago and he only has one more month before coming home (thank God!) and he doesn't seem to believe me when I tell him that me son has started to go back to his old ways. BioSon called me a 'stupid ***** *****' last night when I asked him to turn off his gameboy that I caught him playing with when he knows that bedtime means bedtime. He flew into a rage, threw the game, busted it and then put two more holes in the wall by punching them. We go to Tae kwon Do every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at the request of BioSon's therapist as a way for him to get exercise and hopefully channel aggression in a positive way, and BioSon really enjoys it, however, he will cut off his nose to spite his face. I cannot tell him that if he doesn't behave, I won't take him to class. He will respond with "That's fine. I didn't want to go anyway!" Now I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. If I just leave him at home and take my other kids to class, who knows what BioSon will do when I am gone?! I'd be lucky if my house is still standing! AND HE KNOWS THIS! Am I the only one who is completely at the mercy of their child?! </p><p> </p><p>And my husband is really not helping. I told him about last night, and his reply was 'I don't get it. He was behaving so good. Why is he doing this now?" BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT BioSon DOES!! I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS HERE!! And then my husband begged me to 'please, don't send him to respite', and to have BioSon call him when he gets home from school, that he will talk to him and straighten him out. husband even went so far as to ask me "what if the girls get removed from the house after you call social services? They will say that we are unfit parents and take the girls!" To which I informed him that if I (WE) don't do something now to head off the impending storm and someone does get hurt, then WE WILL be UNFIT parents and the other kids WILL BE removed from the house! Does my husband not see that him talking to BioSon will only keep BioSon pacified for maybe a day or two? I have five more weeks til husband gets home...WTF do I do to protect my other kids and myself?! </p><p> </p><p>The MP's will only do so much, and the county mental health services have not called me back so far today. I am dreading my BioSon getting off the bus and coming home in two hours. He is on an IEP for behavior and school performance, and he has a pending case before the military Juvenile Review Board for a fight that he got into with oldest SSon last week. What am I missing here?! Somebody please tell me, because I want to change the locks on the door!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="OMGWTF, post: 403507, member: 11051"] I am about to lose my damn mind here! My Bio Son is 13 YO and is 'tentatively diagnosed' as CD/ADD/Asperger's even though since he was about 6 YO, I have heard every diagnosis under the sun for him. He has taken every prescription drug known to man to try and take the edge off his behaviors, some of them would work for a short time, then we would have to try something else. He was taken off all medications about a year and a half ago with mixed results. His new psychiatric. has him taking 10mg of Adderall right now which seems to help curb the behaviors at school. He is still getting crappy grades and whatnot. He has been a difficult kid since he was about two years old when he started displaying his defiant behaviors; it took him finally being hospitalized at the age of 6 for someone to finally take me seriously that something is not right with my son. Since then, he has been in the mental health system. I have a two foot tall stack of paperwork on him as well. I am ashamed to say it, but I felt no choice but to start a papertrail on him to protect myself and my other kids. My son's BioDad is not in the picture and the last time my son saw him was 2004. He has no contact with his BioDad whatsoever, and it's probably for the best. My son can be good...when he wants to be. The pattern of behavior I saw unfold over the years was that when a new situation presents itself, it will be anywhere from three weeks to three months before his defiance comes back and he goes off on a nut. Until then, I have gone through so many day care providers it's not even funny. BioSon has been suspended/expelled from every school he has ever attended. He was even expelled from kindergarten for acting like a wild animal and attacking a teacher and principal. He repeated first grade as well. At the start of every school year, I have to pull his teachers aside and warn them about my son. They always tell me 'oh, he'll be OK' and sure enough, in the timeframe of three weeks to three months, they are calling me evety other day telling me that he's suspended from school, to come and get him, he has detention, etc. The only reason he is in seventh grade is because his teachers at his last school last year were so tired of his antics that they went ahead and passed him just to get rid of him. My son has been adjudicated through the Juvenile court system and he spent his eleventh birthday in solitary when he threatened to kill me and my daughter with a knife, destroyed his bedroom, and destroyed school property as well. He was placed on probation for nearly two years and removed from my home to go to foster care as well. The first foster family gave him back at the six month mark because they could not handle him as well. He was returned to my custody at the end of the 2009 school year. I have a Bio daughter as well, she is eleven. I remarried this past June and now have two SSons (13 and 18 YO) and a SDaughter, who is ten. My husband is in the Army and is currently deployed. I have known my husband for over ten years, we served in the Army together and kept in touch after I got out. My husband is a great guy, but he was skeptical when I filled him in on the craziness I have had to deal with at the hands of my son for all these years. My husband deployed a little over a month ago and he only has one more month before coming home (thank God!) and he doesn't seem to believe me when I tell him that me son has started to go back to his old ways. BioSon called me a 'stupid ***** *****' last night when I asked him to turn off his gameboy that I caught him playing with when he knows that bedtime means bedtime. He flew into a rage, threw the game, busted it and then put two more holes in the wall by punching them. We go to Tae kwon Do every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at the request of BioSon's therapist as a way for him to get exercise and hopefully channel aggression in a positive way, and BioSon really enjoys it, however, he will cut off his nose to spite his face. I cannot tell him that if he doesn't behave, I won't take him to class. He will respond with "That's fine. I didn't want to go anyway!" Now I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. If I just leave him at home and take my other kids to class, who knows what BioSon will do when I am gone?! I'd be lucky if my house is still standing! AND HE KNOWS THIS! Am I the only one who is completely at the mercy of their child?! And my husband is really not helping. I told him about last night, and his reply was 'I don't get it. He was behaving so good. Why is he doing this now?" BECAUSE THIS IS WHAT BioSon DOES!! I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS HERE!! And then my husband begged me to 'please, don't send him to respite', and to have BioSon call him when he gets home from school, that he will talk to him and straighten him out. husband even went so far as to ask me "what if the girls get removed from the house after you call social services? They will say that we are unfit parents and take the girls!" To which I informed him that if I (WE) don't do something now to head off the impending storm and someone does get hurt, then WE WILL be UNFIT parents and the other kids WILL BE removed from the house! Does my husband not see that him talking to BioSon will only keep BioSon pacified for maybe a day or two? I have five more weeks til husband gets home...WTF do I do to protect my other kids and myself?! The MP's will only do so much, and the county mental health services have not called me back so far today. I am dreading my BioSon getting off the bus and coming home in two hours. He is on an IEP for behavior and school performance, and he has a pending case before the military Juvenile Review Board for a fight that he got into with oldest SSon last week. What am I missing here?! Somebody please tell me, because I want to change the locks on the door! [/QUOTE]
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