Principal Said Learning Disibilty my Son- starting to name other schools/bad grades

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Confused, Oct 2, 2013.

  1. Confused

    Confused Guest

    My father went to get my kids and he had another meeting with my sons teacher and principal. Well, here's is progress report from worst to best.....( yes catholic school grades religion and grading is different than public- so an
    "A "is 94-100
    "B" is 85-93
    "C" is 84-75
    "D"is 74-70
    "F" is 69 below

    Social Studies -63 Incomplete
    Reading -67 Incomplete
    Religion -71 Incomplete
    Spelling -75 Incomplete
    Science - 78-Incomplete
    Math 78 Incomplete
    English -88
    P.E -100

    ( he is actually starting to do more homework on time the last few days and passed his religion test and spelling I believe)

    Well, Principal says to go to another school ( public) to get my son tested learning disorder! Of course that would be his new school after that. My dad said that is standard procedure according to principal. Well Umm, he knows the work once he can actually focus!!! Speech Teacher ( old) This Teacher, pediatrician Dr said ADHD!!! My son gets up out of his seat during class, draws on himself, finishes half his work but usually correctly or if wrong once he sits to actually read instructions he goes" oh, I get it"!!!! Once they start testing Im afraid they will stick Learning Disibilty on him because he wont be able to do the work/ he wont be concentrating. I feel, In my heart my son is ADHD/ODD and I don't know about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), think thats just defiance because he " forgets" to sniff bowls or clean hands when he thinks no one is watching.

    With the rages/violence can be happy then turn mad, Im soo scared Bipolar :( He doesnt seem to be depressed.. its either Happy or Mad. And hes banging like bloody he&& on his door screaming as we speak because he I told him it looks like he is going to change schools so he can hopefully pass. He screamed" but the Dr suppose to help this month" and there he goes. Then everything making him mad now. I poured him milk he came out and grabbed the half gallon and got ready to pour it and I said" I poured it for you theres your cup" well, he asked me to before his tantrum and he threw the gallon- is in room now beating the door screaming once again OMG Im just ugghhhhhh.. soooooooo loud -it is:twister2:. By the time we do the "meet and greet" this month, I don't know when /what month they do the evaluation, plus time for medications to kick in if they give him medications :(. It could be Christmas!!! Its too late by then!!!!! He would have already failed half the year! Im praying the Dr will get everything done this month!!!! I don't know Im sooooo lost and scared ...
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Can you take him to a neuropsychologist for an evaluation? Christian school isn't really accommodating to differently wired kids. My kids spent three years in Catholic School and did not learn anything.
  3. Confused

    Confused Guest

    MidwestMom- Yes, he has a "meet and greet" with the "Child Neurologist"/MD on the 15th of this month. I doubt he will start an evaluation then and there cuz when we signed the paperwork it said first appointment is 1hr-1hr 1/2 and then they schedule the evaluation " if needed". So Im praying he can see something in my son in that time and do an evaluation like yesterday. I called another Neurologist and he said he can only handle the ADHD not the ODD/Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) any other issues- he would send us out to a psychiatrist or psychologist, or even to the Dr we are already signed up for. But, the one Im going to is recommended from a few different doctors . So I hope so.

    I know what your saying about the school. Im going to go down and talk to them Friday about all this just to see options. My son is still fuming over leaving his school and insists his new Dr can help him :/
    I know its my decision not his, just breaks my heart to see him sooo happy somewhere and pull him out. He really is getting scared I think because of his sudden trying even harder to do H.W

    Thanks for the advice :)
  4. confuzzled

    confuzzled Member

    what the principal is saying is that your public district is responsible for comprehensive testing and is NOT necessarily a given that he will need to go to that school, but most likely your public school has better resources and less of a cookie cutter approach to address his issues. the odds that the catholic program can accommodate your son's needs probably aren't great, but without an educational "label" and identifiable modifications and accomodations he will continue to fall through the cracks.

    it is reasonable to complete the evaluation process through your (public) school system and couple it with a full private evaluation as you currently have scheduled.

    it is important to figure out how to best educate your child--sometimes catholic school cant meet their needs. but if is a matter of simple modifications, you might be surprised at what they are willing to do....something as simple as keeping an agenda and having everyone sign off on it might curb the incompletes, and cost nothing to implement.

    but its very hard to direct you until someone starts to figure out what, exactly, your son needs help with.
  5. Confused

    Confused Guest

    confuzzled, ok maybe I was jumping to conclusions that she didnt want him there, so I will still go in and talk to the district. I was reading about special accommodations like giving half the work in class, and finishing rest for homework maybe, but of course they would have to agree. If they did that for my son after an official evaluation, that would be awesome! I believe that would help. I dont think my son should not have the same workload, just to "finish" the rest at home so he can keep up. Maybe Im wrong tho. Of course tests, I don't know how that would work, if that would be cut down to. medications I dont want to, I discussed them with him cuz he heard the pediatrician and I talking and he ( my son) said" Yes"!!! I want to pass I will take them if they are small cuz I dont know to swallow big pills" He tells me "mommy, I cant think , things distract me". The rage he says hes doing nothing wrong so hmmm...( I just talked to him about his day since he's calm and he told me that) plus he said teacher doesn't give him enough time for his work ( she does) poor baby just cant focus

    The IEP someone mentioned to me, and something about because hes late a lot or misses a lot, it can help him. But I wouldn't tell my son that because he would for sure take it to extreme!!! He loves to be in school, its just getting him going at a reg pace/ or without tantrums, fights etc. But when hes home he complains whole time he wanted to go!
  6. fun fam

    fun fam New Member

    Is there something really special about this school that you want for your son? If not, I would switch him to public. They will probably be more accommodating of his special needs. Also, I am guessing you are paying a lot of money for him to go to private school. You could put this money towards more therapy and help for your son.
  7. Confused

    Confused Guest

    fun fam, I see it as special in the way that our public school system ( all districts)have really gone down hill with scandals, the teaching of basic academics is focused upon how to take and pass the standard test. Once you hit Middle and High school a lot of parents are playing" marry go rounds "trying to find a better school trying to get permission to be transferred. But if they get the transfer, they transfer again at times because of various issues. Of course there are happy kids and parents at all these schools too. Now, all schools have there problems of course, ours has a few issues as well. Yes, half to maybe many teachers are good and Im sure many kids. Im finding out more and more about transition issues with my son and he is happy there.

    BUT......IF I do need to transfer for him, I will. My family isnt forcing him there, neither am I.

    Im not paying a dime for the private school, my grandfather and aunt are for both kids. I wish I had that much money! Medicaid and their Insurensce from their dad is paying plus when I get a job that I can afford to get insurance added to it, I will. My grandfather is willing to help as much as he can with the money, as is my aunt but they are limited. The funds are from their saved up money for an emergency/ retirement day paying the school. They are hoping they help him by a good relgion school so they dont turn out like me. But of course if the public school helps than I will :)
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Sometimes our differently wired kids fall apart with high standards and need to go slower. My son, in particular, picked up very quickly once he was switched to an accomodating public school. The Catholic School tried to help, but they didn't have the resources for it.

    In our state, a private school does not have to test or accomodate kids with special needs and the public schools don't have to help if we as parents do not choose to send our kids to public schools. And, trust me, they didn't!!!! Until the kids were enrolled in public school...we got zilch!
  9. gabe walker

    gabe walker New Member

    if he doesn't have an IEP by all means get one in place even if you think he may "manipulate/take advantage" some how he needs one if he is to be successful in school. If done properly they are dynamic, and multidimensional not just his punctuality. With proper accommodation he can be successful. Most of his grades are not that bad with support they can definitely be improved on, giving him more time to complete assignments, quiet place during testing, tutoring, decreased work load, etc.

    He wants to go to school and likes it, he recognizes that he has difficulties focusing, and following what is going on, I'd give him all the help he needs before he gets frustrated doesn't want to go anymore.

    As for medications don't disregard what may possibly bring calm, and focus to him and piece to the both of you. I made that mistake myself. Resisted starting low dose risperdal for my son because it was an "antipsychotic" an I wanted to avoid those at all costs, well with everything he has been through, the torture and pain he had to endure for so long, the mental anguish of not being able to regulate his emotions, not being able to quiet the thought in his head compelling him to open and slam doors, pick up objects and throw them, slam chairs into tables, run out of classrooms, pick up and set down objects until he was sweating, not being able to walk a straight line, growing angrier by the day. "I'm tired of this", "I just want it to stop." I did him a disservice by not starting it earlier and I'm a health care provider myself who knows better...
  10. Confused

    Confused Guest

    Thank you MidwestMom and gabe walker, definitly things to consider :)

    gabe walker, I am sorry things started out that way. How are things now?