T
TeDo
Guest
I'm not going to get my hopes up but have had a surprising past 2 evenings with difficult child AND easy child. Last night we watched "Wipeout" on ABC as a family. It was wonderful enjoying something as a family again. We laughed, oooo'd and ahhhhh'd together. Then we played a game. No arguing, no complaining, no anything on anyone's part.
Then tonight, I was telling difficult child that he needed to pick up everything he had laying on the floor in rooms where they didn't belong (coat on the dining room floor, toys on the living room floor, etc). He got this sad face and simply said "Why are you always pointing out the bad things I do?" This began a conversation where I pointed out in detail the different good things I praised him for today. He didn't even remember them until I reminded him almost verbatim. Then, before he went upstairs to take a shower, he said "Could you please try to remember to tell me more good things?" At first I was like, ummm, didn't I just tell you about a bunch of them? Then, after almost a full 5 minutes, I realized Hey, he told me in words what was bothering him without any behaviors what so ever. It took another full 2-3 minutes for that to sink in all the way. I made a point of finding him in the family room to tell him "Thank you for telling me how you were feeling with words instead of behaviors. I am very proud of you." He kind of looked at me like I was nuts.
Is it only me or would this be considered progress? I don't want to set myself up for a fall but suddenly realize that maybe things are going to get better. I just wish he could do this at school but then again, with his trust issues I don't see that happening in this lifetime.
Anyway, sorry for the long version but I just HAD to share.
Then tonight, I was telling difficult child that he needed to pick up everything he had laying on the floor in rooms where they didn't belong (coat on the dining room floor, toys on the living room floor, etc). He got this sad face and simply said "Why are you always pointing out the bad things I do?" This began a conversation where I pointed out in detail the different good things I praised him for today. He didn't even remember them until I reminded him almost verbatim. Then, before he went upstairs to take a shower, he said "Could you please try to remember to tell me more good things?" At first I was like, ummm, didn't I just tell you about a bunch of them? Then, after almost a full 5 minutes, I realized Hey, he told me in words what was bothering him without any behaviors what so ever. It took another full 2-3 minutes for that to sink in all the way. I made a point of finding him in the family room to tell him "Thank you for telling me how you were feeling with words instead of behaviors. I am very proud of you." He kind of looked at me like I was nuts.
Is it only me or would this be considered progress? I don't want to set myself up for a fall but suddenly realize that maybe things are going to get better. I just wish he could do this at school but then again, with his trust issues I don't see that happening in this lifetime.
Anyway, sorry for the long version but I just HAD to share.