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Re: Contract post...what if they aren't in Residential Treatment Center (RTC)?
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<blockquote data-quote="branbran" data-source="post: 83971" data-attributes="member: 3762"><p>I soon will be fretting about the very same thing. My 16 yo difficult child is in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and she just came home last weekend for the very first time in almost a year. The visit was awsome. She will be coming home for the weekend next week. She will be coming home for good in August 08. I worry alot about that. I'm so afraid she will regress to the old behaviors, staying out all night, getting high, hanging out with gang members, not to mention the horrors that occur in the house, violent episodes, the terrible cursing, throwing things, etc.... I actually feel guilty for enjoying the peace that is in my household now. I don't want to go back to the chaos, but I do expect it. I'm not counting on miracles, I do however hope that her behavior will have gotten better. She is doing really well right now, our first visit was unbelievable, she didn't even curse once!!!! For her that is a miracle. I too have to write up a contract for our home visits, and am also not sure what it should consist of. I'm guessing, curfew, basic household rules and household duties. For my difficult child it will be hard because she doesn't have friends, hasn't really had them her whole life, she really has trouble maintaining relationships with her peers. So how do I give her a curfew, I don't want her leaving my house at all. I know that is unrealistic, but when she was home she would walk the streets until she found someone to hang out with, usually drug dealers or gang members. I told her that she can only go out without a member of my family when she makes real friends, positive people to hang out with. </p><p></p><p>I too have a problem letting go, I'm so wrapped up in her life I don't know who I am anymore. It's tough for you because your daughter will be 18 so the rules change. You should definately make counseling a condition of her homecoming. That is what I fear, when my daughter turns 18 how do I get her to comply with her treatment ie, medication and therapy? I worry so much about that. So if you could actually make that a rule, go for it. I think household chores should be on the agenda, if they can be responsible in placement then they should take the same responsiblity at home. Sounds good right? Alot easier for me to type than to enforce in my home. lol When my daughter was home her room was a total disaster, shoot every room she went into she left a wreck. In her Residential Treatment Center (RTC), her room is immaculate, her therapist tells me she even color coordinates her clothes!!!! I thought she had the wrong kid in mind. Of course when she was here last weekend, I had to stay on top of her to clean up after herself. Aaah, the joys of motherhood. </p><p></p><p>Good luck with the contract and with the homecoming. Let us know how it goes. I would love any advise with regards to the contents of the contract, as I have no idea what to put in my own. :smile:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="branbran, post: 83971, member: 3762"] I soon will be fretting about the very same thing. My 16 yo difficult child is in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and she just came home last weekend for the very first time in almost a year. The visit was awsome. She will be coming home for the weekend next week. She will be coming home for good in August 08. I worry alot about that. I'm so afraid she will regress to the old behaviors, staying out all night, getting high, hanging out with gang members, not to mention the horrors that occur in the house, violent episodes, the terrible cursing, throwing things, etc.... I actually feel guilty for enjoying the peace that is in my household now. I don't want to go back to the chaos, but I do expect it. I'm not counting on miracles, I do however hope that her behavior will have gotten better. She is doing really well right now, our first visit was unbelievable, she didn't even curse once!!!! For her that is a miracle. I too have to write up a contract for our home visits, and am also not sure what it should consist of. I'm guessing, curfew, basic household rules and household duties. For my difficult child it will be hard because she doesn't have friends, hasn't really had them her whole life, she really has trouble maintaining relationships with her peers. So how do I give her a curfew, I don't want her leaving my house at all. I know that is unrealistic, but when she was home she would walk the streets until she found someone to hang out with, usually drug dealers or gang members. I told her that she can only go out without a member of my family when she makes real friends, positive people to hang out with. I too have a problem letting go, I'm so wrapped up in her life I don't know who I am anymore. It's tough for you because your daughter will be 18 so the rules change. You should definately make counseling a condition of her homecoming. That is what I fear, when my daughter turns 18 how do I get her to comply with her treatment ie, medication and therapy? I worry so much about that. So if you could actually make that a rule, go for it. I think household chores should be on the agenda, if they can be responsible in placement then they should take the same responsiblity at home. Sounds good right? Alot easier for me to type than to enforce in my home. lol When my daughter was home her room was a total disaster, shoot every room she went into she left a wreck. In her Residential Treatment Center (RTC), her room is immaculate, her therapist tells me she even color coordinates her clothes!!!! I thought she had the wrong kid in mind. Of course when she was here last weekend, I had to stay on top of her to clean up after herself. Aaah, the joys of motherhood. Good luck with the contract and with the homecoming. Let us know how it goes. I would love any advise with regards to the contents of the contract, as I have no idea what to put in my own. [img]:smile:[/img] [/QUOTE]
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Re: Contract post...what if they aren't in Residential Treatment Center (RTC)?
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