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Re: Help I need help kicked my son out (Intro post)
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 485552" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>moomm, </p><p></p><p>I dybt== woriqyq about speeellll chick. lol. But I think it does. </p><p></p><p>When I started therapy? I actually went to PROVE to my girlfriend that IF the person that ABUSED me was out of my life - I no longer had A PROBLEM. Remove the problem - problem gone. Simply put - she was the idiot and I just was exhasperated to the point (hang on dog whining so badly I need to get him a bone) SO she took me and opened the door I got out, she got back in and locked the door and said - YOU BETTER go in, it's a 50 mile walk home. I was FURIOUS. I went in.....and ended up talking about junk for an HOUR and 15-30 minutes. Slap me silly...OMG who needs therapy when you can talk like that right> Sigh.....SO I started going BEFORE I got divorced. I lied and said I was playing pool. I went for a year to get the courage and knowledge I needed to leave a hideously abusive marriage. When I had the "smarts" and the PLAN to do so? I put things in motion, had myself in order and left. I went into hiding for nearly 13 years. Long story ......interesting I guess, scary....but I overcame not just survived. </p><p></p><p>I kinda drifted from one therapist to another for a while because they QUIT......OMG I thought it was ME......my story....and yeah it's wild...and almost non-believable. But it's them - they burn out, and we didn't see eye to eye or Id idn't agree with the thought process or the faith background. I finally found this last guy and saw him for about 7 years. My entire family did actually. We went twice a week and son went once. What I learned from him was that things can happen to you in your absolute BEGINNING of life that you store in your mind and you are not conscious about......smells, sights, sounds, all your senses store things in your brain.....all the time - and you aren't even aware. That's why - you smell a smell and you say OMG that is like my old Grade school.......it takes you back. Same with BAD things......bad memories..they're all stored just like a digital camera in your mind. RECALL is hell. SO when you've had enough-----all this stuff that you "STUFF" and keep locked up - finally has to come out somewhere and BLAMO.......RAGE, CRY, EXPLOSION...and you're body has had SO MUCH stress that you just go koo koo and your family is like - WHAT THE??????? THen you look like a nutt.......and instead of dealing with issues......YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT from early on to stiffle, shut up, stuff it......store it.....and what's happening now is that your storage unit (your brain) is FULL TO CAPACITY......</p><p></p><p>WHat a therapist does is helps you go through your mental storage unit and get rid of the bad junk files.......shred a lot of the ****.......and replace those memories with WHY's of YOU WERE TOO LITTLE TO DEAL with it and YOU HAD NO CONTROL over it's. But you can't do that on your own.......it takes a professional. It really really does and IT TAKES TIME......but you need to DO IT.........to get THROUGH IT.....and stand strong in the face of the junk that your going to go through with your son, your in laws and the people in your life that are NOT going to be able to support you - YOU HAVE THE ABILITY INSIDE YOURSELF TO SUPPORT YOURSELF AND STAND ALONE (actually you are never alone) but......it's there. You just need to have it pulled out .......with help. ANd know thinks and belive things like - OMG I am smart, I am beautiful....I am intelligent, I can do this and that......and I don't and will NOT take YOUR **** and I am sorry that you are miserable but I am not a fixer or problem solver. AND you will learn over again how to be compassionte. </p><p></p><p>Trust that.......</p><p></p><p>Hugs & Love </p><p>STar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 485552, member: 4964"] moomm, I dybt== woriqyq about speeellll chick. lol. But I think it does. When I started therapy? I actually went to PROVE to my girlfriend that IF the person that ABUSED me was out of my life - I no longer had A PROBLEM. Remove the problem - problem gone. Simply put - she was the idiot and I just was exhasperated to the point (hang on dog whining so badly I need to get him a bone) SO she took me and opened the door I got out, she got back in and locked the door and said - YOU BETTER go in, it's a 50 mile walk home. I was FURIOUS. I went in.....and ended up talking about junk for an HOUR and 15-30 minutes. Slap me silly...OMG who needs therapy when you can talk like that right> Sigh.....SO I started going BEFORE I got divorced. I lied and said I was playing pool. I went for a year to get the courage and knowledge I needed to leave a hideously abusive marriage. When I had the "smarts" and the PLAN to do so? I put things in motion, had myself in order and left. I went into hiding for nearly 13 years. Long story ......interesting I guess, scary....but I overcame not just survived. I kinda drifted from one therapist to another for a while because they QUIT......OMG I thought it was ME......my story....and yeah it's wild...and almost non-believable. But it's them - they burn out, and we didn't see eye to eye or Id idn't agree with the thought process or the faith background. I finally found this last guy and saw him for about 7 years. My entire family did actually. We went twice a week and son went once. What I learned from him was that things can happen to you in your absolute BEGINNING of life that you store in your mind and you are not conscious about......smells, sights, sounds, all your senses store things in your brain.....all the time - and you aren't even aware. That's why - you smell a smell and you say OMG that is like my old Grade school.......it takes you back. Same with BAD things......bad memories..they're all stored just like a digital camera in your mind. RECALL is hell. SO when you've had enough-----all this stuff that you "STUFF" and keep locked up - finally has to come out somewhere and BLAMO.......RAGE, CRY, EXPLOSION...and you're body has had SO MUCH stress that you just go koo koo and your family is like - WHAT THE??????? THen you look like a nutt.......and instead of dealing with issues......YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT from early on to stiffle, shut up, stuff it......store it.....and what's happening now is that your storage unit (your brain) is FULL TO CAPACITY...... WHat a therapist does is helps you go through your mental storage unit and get rid of the bad junk files.......shred a lot of the ****.......and replace those memories with WHY's of YOU WERE TOO LITTLE TO DEAL with it and YOU HAD NO CONTROL over it's. But you can't do that on your own.......it takes a professional. It really really does and IT TAKES TIME......but you need to DO IT.........to get THROUGH IT.....and stand strong in the face of the junk that your going to go through with your son, your in laws and the people in your life that are NOT going to be able to support you - YOU HAVE THE ABILITY INSIDE YOURSELF TO SUPPORT YOURSELF AND STAND ALONE (actually you are never alone) but......it's there. You just need to have it pulled out .......with help. ANd know thinks and belive things like - OMG I am smart, I am beautiful....I am intelligent, I can do this and that......and I don't and will NOT take YOUR **** and I am sorry that you are miserable but I am not a fixer or problem solver. AND you will learn over again how to be compassionte. Trust that....... Hugs & Love STar [/QUOTE]
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Re: Help I need help kicked my son out (Intro post)
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