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<blockquote data-quote="Deja" data-source="post: 529779" data-attributes="member: 14564"><p>I'm glad I found this site earlier than later. We kicked my son out on 5/1, but had given him that date on 4/7. He had options, e.g. moving in with his older brother for 1 month, but he didn't like the idea of paying rent (Ha!). We suspect he's living with the family of a friend, for now. After reading many threads (and I read everyday) we suspect he will ask to come back at some point. Since this is his first "out of the house" experience, and he does have a job (albeit part-time), we would allow him to come back WITH RESTRICTIONS/REQUIREMENTS.</p><p>Here's where you come in. We have some ideas (listed below), but know there are more. So either let us know some of yours, or let us know where to find suggestions. Everything will be written down and signed. This will be a contract with- difficult child.</p><p></p><p>Our list so far:</p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Ask difficult child <u><strong>why </strong></u>he wants to come back. We are not to give him the answer.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Just like unemployment, he'll need to tell us what he did on any given day, to find FT employment.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Seek and attend "finding FT employment" workshops. They are free.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Going back to college (he's 21) does not mean a free ride.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">There is a time limit (60 days?) to how long he can stay in the house.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">If we have to travel, he will need to find other residence for that time. House alarm will be activated.</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Allowance and amount it is to be clearly defined. Nothing more. And it will become less over time. (Thinking is enough for gas to get to work/ find a job. Concert? Not on our dime, or $40.)</li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul">Drug testing? (would really like your comments on this one.)</li> </ul><p></p><p></p><p>And?.....tell us what we're missing. We know there's a lot!</p><p>Thanks, parents!</p><p><span style="font-size: 9px"> (Group hug)</span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Deja, post: 529779, member: 14564"] I'm glad I found this site earlier than later. We kicked my son out on 5/1, but had given him that date on 4/7. He had options, e.g. moving in with his older brother for 1 month, but he didn't like the idea of paying rent (Ha!). We suspect he's living with the family of a friend, for now. After reading many threads (and I read everyday) we suspect he will ask to come back at some point. Since this is his first "out of the house" experience, and he does have a job (albeit part-time), we would allow him to come back WITH RESTRICTIONS/REQUIREMENTS. Here's where you come in. We have some ideas (listed below), but know there are more. So either let us know some of yours, or let us know where to find suggestions. Everything will be written down and signed. This will be a contract with- difficult child. Our list so far: [LIST] [*]Ask difficult child [U][B]why [/B][/U]he wants to come back. We are not to give him the answer. [*]Just like unemployment, he'll need to tell us what he did on any given day, to find FT employment. [*]Seek and attend "finding FT employment" workshops. They are free. [*]Going back to college (he's 21) does not mean a free ride. [*]There is a time limit (60 days?) to how long he can stay in the house. [*]If we have to travel, he will need to find other residence for that time. House alarm will be activated. [*]Allowance and amount it is to be clearly defined. Nothing more. And it will become less over time. (Thinking is enough for gas to get to work/ find a job. Concert? Not on our dime, or $40.) [*]Drug testing? (would really like your comments on this one.) [/LIST] And?.....tell us what we're missing. We know there's a lot! Thanks, parents! [SIZE=1] (Group hug)[/SIZE] [/QUOTE]
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