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Relief at finding a site like this, does my situation fit?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 567480" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN!!!!!</p><p></p><p>This child is sexually abusing your children. That is what walking in on them in the bathroom is. It is often one of the first steps to becoming a sexual offender. If sex offenses are a ladder, that is one of the bottom rungs. Until your daughters have had a lot of therapy AND they are positive that he won't ever live with them or be around them, you won't know the true extent of what he has done to them. </p><p></p><p>This child attempted to kill your children. That is what holding their heads under water is. Period. </p><p></p><p>This child has attempted to seriously hurt your kids. He wanted to cause them to have LIFELONG problems with their eyes when he made them look into the red laser. He has <strong>successfully</strong> abused them physically in other ways.</p><p></p><p>He is disrespectful and abusive verbally to everyone and yet you are supposed to let an infant be around him? He gets upset and acts out when his siblings or your kids get attention and/or get control of even the smallest parts of the family life.</p><p></p><p>WHY ON EARTH would you consider allowing your baby's life to be endangered by this very dangerous child? Exactly what woudl happen when he was left in a room for a minute or two so you could do something for one of your other kids or for anyone not him? The baby is so helpless and you couldn't even keep your older kids safe from him. I know you tried HARD to keep them safe, but sometimes the ONLY way to do that is to not allow the danger to be around them.</p><p></p><p>I would be very upset if the father of my child kept insisting that a dangerous child with a history of harming other children should be around our child. You are not blowing this out of proportion. If this boy isn't safe around your older children, ones who can speak up and tell what he did, how is he to be safe around an infant? Esp as he does exactly what you tell hm not to do as long as that action hurts someone. Your baby cannot do anything but cry and it takes some work to get to the point where you understand his cries. People who do not spend a lot of time with the baby won't understand what his cries mean and then they won't be able to help.</p><p></p><p>I do have to wonder why people push us to allow unsafe, volatile people around our children. even if that person is a child, other children and adults need to be protected from him.</p><p></p><p>I do think the child needs major help and likely has Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). That doesn't mean he can be allowed to abuse people. In my area CPS will have a fit if a child is kept around someone who has hurt them so much. been there done that. If we hadn't refused to allow our son into our home after he had attacked me several times (this was almost a year after he spent 4 mos in a psychiatric hospital), CPS would have taken our OTHER children. They wouldn't take the one violent child, and wouldn't offer services to help us, but they would take our other 2 kids. We would have been judged unfit parents for allowing our other son to hurt them so they would have been taken. in my opinion that is soooo wrong because it ends up with the other 2 kids being further traumatized just so that CPS didn't have to find help for our difficult child. My son went to live with my parents and turned himself around, but he does not have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD).</p><p></p><p>Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) does not speak of a healthy future for this boy. I am sorry about that. But the facts are that he is dangerous and wll be more so in the future, most liekly. Esp in a couple of years when the hormones take control.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 567480, member: 1233"] RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN!!!!! This child is sexually abusing your children. That is what walking in on them in the bathroom is. It is often one of the first steps to becoming a sexual offender. If sex offenses are a ladder, that is one of the bottom rungs. Until your daughters have had a lot of therapy AND they are positive that he won't ever live with them or be around them, you won't know the true extent of what he has done to them. This child attempted to kill your children. That is what holding their heads under water is. Period. This child has attempted to seriously hurt your kids. He wanted to cause them to have LIFELONG problems with their eyes when he made them look into the red laser. He has [B]successfully[/B] abused them physically in other ways. He is disrespectful and abusive verbally to everyone and yet you are supposed to let an infant be around him? He gets upset and acts out when his siblings or your kids get attention and/or get control of even the smallest parts of the family life. WHY ON EARTH would you consider allowing your baby's life to be endangered by this very dangerous child? Exactly what woudl happen when he was left in a room for a minute or two so you could do something for one of your other kids or for anyone not him? The baby is so helpless and you couldn't even keep your older kids safe from him. I know you tried HARD to keep them safe, but sometimes the ONLY way to do that is to not allow the danger to be around them. I would be very upset if the father of my child kept insisting that a dangerous child with a history of harming other children should be around our child. You are not blowing this out of proportion. If this boy isn't safe around your older children, ones who can speak up and tell what he did, how is he to be safe around an infant? Esp as he does exactly what you tell hm not to do as long as that action hurts someone. Your baby cannot do anything but cry and it takes some work to get to the point where you understand his cries. People who do not spend a lot of time with the baby won't understand what his cries mean and then they won't be able to help. I do have to wonder why people push us to allow unsafe, volatile people around our children. even if that person is a child, other children and adults need to be protected from him. I do think the child needs major help and likely has Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). That doesn't mean he can be allowed to abuse people. In my area CPS will have a fit if a child is kept around someone who has hurt them so much. been there done that. If we hadn't refused to allow our son into our home after he had attacked me several times (this was almost a year after he spent 4 mos in a psychiatric hospital), CPS would have taken our OTHER children. They wouldn't take the one violent child, and wouldn't offer services to help us, but they would take our other 2 kids. We would have been judged unfit parents for allowing our other son to hurt them so they would have been taken. in my opinion that is soooo wrong because it ends up with the other 2 kids being further traumatized just so that CPS didn't have to find help for our difficult child. My son went to live with my parents and turned himself around, but he does not have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) does not speak of a healthy future for this boy. I am sorry about that. But the facts are that he is dangerous and wll be more so in the future, most liekly. Esp in a couple of years when the hormones take control. [/QUOTE]
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