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<blockquote data-quote="dashcat" data-source="post: 382466" data-attributes="member: 9175"><p>I've posted about this before. My daughter has been doing this for years. Earlier, it was love at first sight across the dance floor at a school dance or in church youth group. It was always insta-love, and the guys were usually either a little younger or the sort of guy the girls never noticed. She is a beautiful girl, so - in high school - this was a heady experience. She'd shower him with compliments (you'r so hot!), attention and affection. Then the stories would begin... she'd "need" him because her crazy mom (that would be me) was suicidal, drunk, kicking her out of the house, yelling (well, the yelling maybe...but the others are false) or her dad was drunk, angry for no reason, not speaking to her, running off with another woman (the last true, sadly, but she recycled it to death). After she wore out the parent crisises, she'd "need" him because of her anorexia (false), cutting (false) .... If the poor guiy was still around after all of this, she'd find another insta-love and dump him unceremoniously.</p><p> </p><p>Now the pattern is quite a bit scarier. She's run out of in real life guys because she's reached an age where this sophomoric behavior sends them running at first sight. Now she meets them on free online dating sites. She's moved in with two of these characters (one out of state). They never have any money is she makes minimum wage at a part time job. Only one of her in real life guys was a difficult child - ALL the internet guys are difficult children.</p><p> </p><p>There's even been a female love interest. That lasted a week but did result in a mutual lip piercing (ick).</p><p> </p><p>She is currenlty living with her dad and there are at least three - that I know of - internet dudes coming around. I think she's moved from insta-love to what she would call "playing the field". She becomes sexually involved right away and there's always the drama. If the guy dumps her, she is brokenhearted and continues to pursue...tries to make him jealous with the new relationships....etc. If she dumps the guy, he (or she) is history right away.</p><p> </p><p>It's very, very scary. Believe me, she'd be looking at airfare to Germany just like your daughter is - just from meeting the mom.</p><p> </p><p>We are working on trying to get her evaluated but, as far as she's concerned (and unfortunately her dad is with her most days on this), she's fine. Not a thing wrong.</p><p> </p><p>I feel your pain, but do realize that your difficult child-daughter isn't doing this "to you". Her motives aren't really even motives in the true sense. Her searching - and the way she is going about it - is all about the pinball machine playing continually in her mind.</p><p> </p><p>Dash</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dashcat, post: 382466, member: 9175"] I've posted about this before. My daughter has been doing this for years. Earlier, it was love at first sight across the dance floor at a school dance or in church youth group. It was always insta-love, and the guys were usually either a little younger or the sort of guy the girls never noticed. She is a beautiful girl, so - in high school - this was a heady experience. She'd shower him with compliments (you'r so hot!), attention and affection. Then the stories would begin... she'd "need" him because her crazy mom (that would be me) was suicidal, drunk, kicking her out of the house, yelling (well, the yelling maybe...but the others are false) or her dad was drunk, angry for no reason, not speaking to her, running off with another woman (the last true, sadly, but she recycled it to death). After she wore out the parent crisises, she'd "need" him because of her anorexia (false), cutting (false) .... If the poor guiy was still around after all of this, she'd find another insta-love and dump him unceremoniously. Now the pattern is quite a bit scarier. She's run out of in real life guys because she's reached an age where this sophomoric behavior sends them running at first sight. Now she meets them on free online dating sites. She's moved in with two of these characters (one out of state). They never have any money is she makes minimum wage at a part time job. Only one of her in real life guys was a difficult child - ALL the internet guys are difficult children. There's even been a female love interest. That lasted a week but did result in a mutual lip piercing (ick). She is currenlty living with her dad and there are at least three - that I know of - internet dudes coming around. I think she's moved from insta-love to what she would call "playing the field". She becomes sexually involved right away and there's always the drama. If the guy dumps her, she is brokenhearted and continues to pursue...tries to make him jealous with the new relationships....etc. If she dumps the guy, he (or she) is history right away. It's very, very scary. Believe me, she'd be looking at airfare to Germany just like your daughter is - just from meeting the mom. We are working on trying to get her evaluated but, as far as she's concerned (and unfortunately her dad is with her most days on this), she's fine. Not a thing wrong. I feel your pain, but do realize that your difficult child-daughter isn't doing this "to you". Her motives aren't really even motives in the true sense. Her searching - and the way she is going about it - is all about the pinball machine playing continually in her mind. Dash [/QUOTE]
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