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Substance Abuse
Rosepress....I'm thinking of you today!
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 602453" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>So much of what your son is doing to you sounds so familiar. Hopefully your son does not have the same mental health issues as my son but the attitude of its "just weed", being awful to you, and "no other parents do this" is all something I have been through.</p><p></p><p>I have been sworn at, called names, and told I would never see my grandchildren (who thankfully dont exist yet). </p><p></p><p>But I will say that we are moving into a better relationship. I dont think it will ever be really close until he is sober and wants to be, and has dealt with some of his mental health issues... but it is much closer than it was. He now does tell us he loves us (didnt do that for years) and yesterday when he got suicidal he called us.... and was gald we were with him when we took him to the hospital and thanked us when we were leaving. I dont think he is really blaming us anymore for his messed up life.... </p><p></p><p>The other thing I want to say is you really do need to keep protecting your younger son. He is making it very clear he wants and needs you to do that. That was also true of my daughter and she has totally thrived since my son has not been here. I am convinced that she would nto be doing as well if he had been at home these last three years.</p><p></p><p>She and my son do not currently have a relationship which is heartbreaking to me as they were close when they were younger.... but I also can see that until he gets his act together they wont have one and it is really up to him to mend it. She is keeping a healthy distance from him and that has to be ok with me.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 602453, member: 15801"] So much of what your son is doing to you sounds so familiar. Hopefully your son does not have the same mental health issues as my son but the attitude of its "just weed", being awful to you, and "no other parents do this" is all something I have been through. I have been sworn at, called names, and told I would never see my grandchildren (who thankfully dont exist yet). But I will say that we are moving into a better relationship. I dont think it will ever be really close until he is sober and wants to be, and has dealt with some of his mental health issues... but it is much closer than it was. He now does tell us he loves us (didnt do that for years) and yesterday when he got suicidal he called us.... and was gald we were with him when we took him to the hospital and thanked us when we were leaving. I dont think he is really blaming us anymore for his messed up life.... The other thing I want to say is you really do need to keep protecting your younger son. He is making it very clear he wants and needs you to do that. That was also true of my daughter and she has totally thrived since my son has not been here. I am convinced that she would nto be doing as well if he had been at home these last three years. She and my son do not currently have a relationship which is heartbreaking to me as they were close when they were younger.... but I also can see that until he gets his act together they wont have one and it is really up to him to mend it. She is keeping a healthy distance from him and that has to be ok with me. TL [/QUOTE]
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