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Parent Emeritus
Rude, disrespectful, WHY WHY WHY did I agree to this?
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 678208" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>We did let them back in, because it felt like the best course of action. Because we did think, or still think, that we could tough it out despite the obnoxiousness and all the inconvenience. I also get it why they are like that and that conversation in car could had easily happened in mine. Mine have been back home close to two months now and we will allow him to stay at least till fall if we need to.</p><p></p><p>Our relationship with them is carved on the stone. While they do learn and develop new ways to communicate and behave, they try them first to newer people in their life and strangers. With parents, the roles and patterns from puberty and teen years stuck. It's not even kids with problems. Many of classmates and friends of my oldest are upstanding young people, who are starting to take great responsibility of things out there, still many of them are stuck to surly teen behaviour and communication patterns with their parents. With them it will surely ease with time, with our troubled kids it is likely to take more time and with some, it may unfortunately never change.</p><p></p><p>This is not an advice, just something I find helpful in my, somewhat similar situation with disruptive 22-year-old in my home: I keep reminding myself that I made a decision to take him in as an informed, competent person. I knew how he is and how this would be. I knew that at times having him here would make me miserable. I chose to have him here, because I knew I could take that inconvenience. It's not fun, but some things in life and love are not. My choice, my consequences and it is not someone else's fault, not even my obnoxious kid's.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 678208, member: 14557"] We did let them back in, because it felt like the best course of action. Because we did think, or still think, that we could tough it out despite the obnoxiousness and all the inconvenience. I also get it why they are like that and that conversation in car could had easily happened in mine. Mine have been back home close to two months now and we will allow him to stay at least till fall if we need to. Our relationship with them is carved on the stone. While they do learn and develop new ways to communicate and behave, they try them first to newer people in their life and strangers. With parents, the roles and patterns from puberty and teen years stuck. It's not even kids with problems. Many of classmates and friends of my oldest are upstanding young people, who are starting to take great responsibility of things out there, still many of them are stuck to surly teen behaviour and communication patterns with their parents. With them it will surely ease with time, with our troubled kids it is likely to take more time and with some, it may unfortunately never change. This is not an advice, just something I find helpful in my, somewhat similar situation with disruptive 22-year-old in my home: I keep reminding myself that I made a decision to take him in as an informed, competent person. I knew how he is and how this would be. I knew that at times having him here would make me miserable. I chose to have him here, because I knew I could take that inconvenience. It's not fun, but some things in life and love are not. My choice, my consequences and it is not someone else's fault, not even my obnoxious kid's. [/QUOTE]
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Rude, disrespectful, WHY WHY WHY did I agree to this?
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