Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Scared: New Baby Arriving in April 2011
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 392435" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I truly hope that you and he can work with a therapist to get through this. in my opinion with-o some counselling you and he simply will not be able to overcome this, regardless of whether his heart melts when he sees his newborn child or not. I know I would have been so hurt and traumatized by a spouse who pushed me to give up my child (esp after we already had 2 children together) that my feelings would be permanently changed for him no matter how hard I tried to stay in love with him. There would just be too much damage done.</p><p> </p><p>I am also VERY worried about you. Are you aware that murder is one of the leading causes of death of pregnant women? Your odds of dying are greatly increased during pregnancy, and the odds of being murdered are incredibly higher when preg than when not preg. Last statistics I saw listed murder as one of the top 2 or 3 causes of death of pregnant women. Often a spouse/father of the child who doesn't want the child chooses this as a way to escape the impending responsibilities of fatherhood. </p><p> </p><p>If you have ANY fears for your safety, or your children's safety, LEAVE NOW. Even if it is just a niggling feeling that you cannot put your finger on why, GET OUT. You can repair the relationship in therapy and then move back in with him. If he is unmedicated, or his moods are not stable on his current medications, get him a psychiatrist appointment and go home Occupational Therapist (OT) your parents for a while. I am NOT joking. Do NOT discuss it, trust your instincts even if it seems like a crazy thing to be afraid of. Those instincts are there for a REASON.</p><p> </p><p>If your husband will not go to therapy with you, go without him. Don't put it off or wait - you will NEED support as you go through your pregnancy. We will be here for you, and it sounds like your parents are, but you still will need somewhere to work through all your feelings for your husband and a therapist is a great place to do that. </p><p> </p><p>Sending you LOTs of hugs!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 392435, member: 1233"] I truly hope that you and he can work with a therapist to get through this. in my opinion with-o some counselling you and he simply will not be able to overcome this, regardless of whether his heart melts when he sees his newborn child or not. I know I would have been so hurt and traumatized by a spouse who pushed me to give up my child (esp after we already had 2 children together) that my feelings would be permanently changed for him no matter how hard I tried to stay in love with him. There would just be too much damage done. I am also VERY worried about you. Are you aware that murder is one of the leading causes of death of pregnant women? Your odds of dying are greatly increased during pregnancy, and the odds of being murdered are incredibly higher when preg than when not preg. Last statistics I saw listed murder as one of the top 2 or 3 causes of death of pregnant women. Often a spouse/father of the child who doesn't want the child chooses this as a way to escape the impending responsibilities of fatherhood. If you have ANY fears for your safety, or your children's safety, LEAVE NOW. Even if it is just a niggling feeling that you cannot put your finger on why, GET OUT. You can repair the relationship in therapy and then move back in with him. If he is unmedicated, or his moods are not stable on his current medications, get him a psychiatrist appointment and go home Occupational Therapist (OT) your parents for a while. I am NOT joking. Do NOT discuss it, trust your instincts even if it seems like a crazy thing to be afraid of. Those instincts are there for a REASON. If your husband will not go to therapy with you, go without him. Don't put it off or wait - you will NEED support as you go through your pregnancy. We will be here for you, and it sounds like your parents are, but you still will need somewhere to work through all your feelings for your husband and a therapist is a great place to do that. Sending you LOTs of hugs! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Scared: New Baby Arriving in April 2011
Top