I don't know who to talk to about this. Last week some "friends" of my husband showed up at his office and told him that there was a major issue that could cause him lots of trouble but if he wrote a check for $20,000 it would all go away.
At first he told me that it had to do with a client of his and that he had "helped" his girlfriend with a problem. And supposedly now this couple had gone to the state police to report his supposedly illegal assistance and that the state police contacted this friend of his. When I asked what it was really about, he was a bit vague, but said it had something to do with trying to exchange sexual favors for this "service". I was stunned. He said nothing actually happened but he did call this person. When I asked why, he said that he was contemplating "doing something" with her.
He later got a call from the "friend" who was wanting big cash to settle with these people and I eavesdropped on his side of the conversation - I really needed to know what I am up against!!!!
It turns out that the whole issue is really that he met a 16 year old girl at a nearby store and was chatting with her. Then he went back another time to buy something and this girl was "hitting on him". He gave her his phone number supposedly to call for babysitting work. Later he called her twice (again supposedly to chat about babysitting). But the girl told her parents that she was being "stalked" by this guy and they hired a security firm to do surveillance. The firm traced the cell phone number to my husband's number - and coincidently, the security guy is someone he knows QUITE well - they are friends! Well, apparently he told another friend of my husband's and the second guy is the one who came up with the story that if my husband paid him $20K, he could make this situation go away.
My husband did write the check and give it to them but I talked to him that night and told him he needed to give it back as it is totally wrong!!! So we got the money back, but the friend who was trying to scam him for the money is probably very upset that his "scam" didn't work and he may lash out.
So now we are in limbo, terrified, waiting for the next shoe to fall. If this family figures out who he is, I don't know what they will do. I want to believe my husband that nothing actually happened - a few phone calls and no more.
But I don't know if there is any legal issue with this contact with the 16 year old. And of course, I am devastated and unsure how to handle this whole thing. My husband has apologized profusely, over and over, and said it was a stupid mistake. And it will never happen again!
To me, stupid is something you do that only hurts yourself (such as sticking your finger in a light socket). WRONG is something you do which is ethically, morally, intellectually WRONG and will hurt many people.
I don't know what to do. I will certainly seek marital counseling but I also need individual counseling for myself as I cannot handle this stressor on top of all of our difficult child woes.
I appreciate any feedback, advice you can offer.
At first he told me that it had to do with a client of his and that he had "helped" his girlfriend with a problem. And supposedly now this couple had gone to the state police to report his supposedly illegal assistance and that the state police contacted this friend of his. When I asked what it was really about, he was a bit vague, but said it had something to do with trying to exchange sexual favors for this "service". I was stunned. He said nothing actually happened but he did call this person. When I asked why, he said that he was contemplating "doing something" with her.
He later got a call from the "friend" who was wanting big cash to settle with these people and I eavesdropped on his side of the conversation - I really needed to know what I am up against!!!!
It turns out that the whole issue is really that he met a 16 year old girl at a nearby store and was chatting with her. Then he went back another time to buy something and this girl was "hitting on him". He gave her his phone number supposedly to call for babysitting work. Later he called her twice (again supposedly to chat about babysitting). But the girl told her parents that she was being "stalked" by this guy and they hired a security firm to do surveillance. The firm traced the cell phone number to my husband's number - and coincidently, the security guy is someone he knows QUITE well - they are friends! Well, apparently he told another friend of my husband's and the second guy is the one who came up with the story that if my husband paid him $20K, he could make this situation go away.
My husband did write the check and give it to them but I talked to him that night and told him he needed to give it back as it is totally wrong!!! So we got the money back, but the friend who was trying to scam him for the money is probably very upset that his "scam" didn't work and he may lash out.
So now we are in limbo, terrified, waiting for the next shoe to fall. If this family figures out who he is, I don't know what they will do. I want to believe my husband that nothing actually happened - a few phone calls and no more.
But I don't know if there is any legal issue with this contact with the 16 year old. And of course, I am devastated and unsure how to handle this whole thing. My husband has apologized profusely, over and over, and said it was a stupid mistake. And it will never happen again!
To me, stupid is something you do that only hurts yourself (such as sticking your finger in a light socket). WRONG is something you do which is ethically, morally, intellectually WRONG and will hurt many people.
I don't know what to do. I will certainly seek marital counseling but I also need individual counseling for myself as I cannot handle this stressor on top of all of our difficult child woes.
I appreciate any feedback, advice you can offer.