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Seriously Thinking About Just Giving Up
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 516772" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I actually think your husband did a good thing. He needs to tell your son in no uncertain terms that NO ONE is going to call HIS WIFE those names anytime and he means it. He doesnt care if it is his son, a homeless bum or some stranger on the street. He simply will not tolerate it. Now the best time to tell him this may be at a family meeting instead of in the morning when he is already upset but your son needs to hear this loud and clear. And the wording truly has to be HIS WIFE not your sons mother. </p><p></p><p>Your son sees you as his personal slave and puppet. You belong to him alone. You are to do his bidding and everyone else can go to hades. He needs to find out fast that he isnt number one in the family. You and your husband are the head of the family and are a team. The children are are just that...children and are equals...no one is better than the other. No one gets to have more attention than the other or gets to make demands just because they think they have power. If they try to exert power, they lose power. He needs to have some sort of punishment imposed on him for every time he follows you around and screams at you. Now this is going to have to get creative because you cant just get into it with him right then. I would use some form of behavior mod thing where you start with a jar full of ping pong balls and every time he does these kinds of behaviors you simply go and remove a ball. Dont say a word. If at the end of the week he has a certain amount of balls left, he is able to turn them in for a reward you have set in advance. You would have to do this for both boys though and get different colored balls. Write everything out so he understands. 5 balls means a mini candy bar. 10 balls means he gets to ride his bike for x amount of time, 20 balls means a trip to the dollar store. 20 balls means he gets a friend over. </p><p></p><p>I think you are going to need like a hundred balls for this for a week because he is soooo tough.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 516772, member: 1514"] I actually think your husband did a good thing. He needs to tell your son in no uncertain terms that NO ONE is going to call HIS WIFE those names anytime and he means it. He doesnt care if it is his son, a homeless bum or some stranger on the street. He simply will not tolerate it. Now the best time to tell him this may be at a family meeting instead of in the morning when he is already upset but your son needs to hear this loud and clear. And the wording truly has to be HIS WIFE not your sons mother. Your son sees you as his personal slave and puppet. You belong to him alone. You are to do his bidding and everyone else can go to hades. He needs to find out fast that he isnt number one in the family. You and your husband are the head of the family and are a team. The children are are just that...children and are equals...no one is better than the other. No one gets to have more attention than the other or gets to make demands just because they think they have power. If they try to exert power, they lose power. He needs to have some sort of punishment imposed on him for every time he follows you around and screams at you. Now this is going to have to get creative because you cant just get into it with him right then. I would use some form of behavior mod thing where you start with a jar full of ping pong balls and every time he does these kinds of behaviors you simply go and remove a ball. Dont say a word. If at the end of the week he has a certain amount of balls left, he is able to turn them in for a reward you have set in advance. You would have to do this for both boys though and get different colored balls. Write everything out so he understands. 5 balls means a mini candy bar. 10 balls means he gets to ride his bike for x amount of time, 20 balls means a trip to the dollar store. 20 balls means he gets a friend over. I think you are going to need like a hundred balls for this for a week because he is soooo tough. [/QUOTE]
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