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Small Kanga update
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 444273" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>JJJ - this was the hardest age. Impending "adulthood", the knowledge that they are completely unprepared for independent life, and their delusions of the grand scope of their abilities that have no basis in fact. I haven't checked on the listserv in a while, but I think another concern is whether funding will continue past 18 - regardless of stated aim to serve kids to 21, my gut says they're probably dropping kids once they hit 18 as a rule. With adult services being based on compliance and cooperation, kids like ours fall through the cracks. </p><p></p><p>I think it's time to adopt the bobble-head approach - neutral responses to her fairy tales. Keep in touch with- staff so that you're all on the same page, but don't expect Kanga to even get to the same book. I would really press staff to work on discharge planning *now* because I think there's a decent chance Kanga will walk at 18. It would be ideal if they could work on hooking her into the community there. Doesn't guarantee she'll stay or utilize resources but... that's about all that can be done. If she returns to Chicago there will unfortunately be many more opportunities for her to couch surf, etc. - basically, not work on getting a life. Though, realistically, I think probably anywhere our kids are they can find people who will take them in. It never ceases to amaze me.</p><p></p><p>husband and I had worked out all kinds of contingency plans once thank you was on his own. Letting kids' schools know thank you was *not* to be allowed to pick them up. We were prepared to install alarm system on house. Fortunately, thank you was so wrapped up in his own dysfunctional world that it was all a nonissue. We didn't hear from him for months on end.</p><p></p><p>Gentle hugs to you - I remember an overwhelming sense of desperation as thank you hit 17 and then 18. We cannot force them to be safe, to make decent decisions. Never could, but when they're out their on their own... it's incredibly difficult.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 444273, member: 8"] JJJ - this was the hardest age. Impending "adulthood", the knowledge that they are completely unprepared for independent life, and their delusions of the grand scope of their abilities that have no basis in fact. I haven't checked on the listserv in a while, but I think another concern is whether funding will continue past 18 - regardless of stated aim to serve kids to 21, my gut says they're probably dropping kids once they hit 18 as a rule. With adult services being based on compliance and cooperation, kids like ours fall through the cracks. I think it's time to adopt the bobble-head approach - neutral responses to her fairy tales. Keep in touch with- staff so that you're all on the same page, but don't expect Kanga to even get to the same book. I would really press staff to work on discharge planning *now* because I think there's a decent chance Kanga will walk at 18. It would be ideal if they could work on hooking her into the community there. Doesn't guarantee she'll stay or utilize resources but... that's about all that can be done. If she returns to Chicago there will unfortunately be many more opportunities for her to couch surf, etc. - basically, not work on getting a life. Though, realistically, I think probably anywhere our kids are they can find people who will take them in. It never ceases to amaze me. husband and I had worked out all kinds of contingency plans once thank you was on his own. Letting kids' schools know thank you was *not* to be allowed to pick them up. We were prepared to install alarm system on house. Fortunately, thank you was so wrapped up in his own dysfunctional world that it was all a nonissue. We didn't hear from him for months on end. Gentle hugs to you - I remember an overwhelming sense of desperation as thank you hit 17 and then 18. We cannot force them to be safe, to make decent decisions. Never could, but when they're out their on their own... it's incredibly difficult. [/QUOTE]
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